Kissing 101: Comfort, Compatibility & Communication
What you should know before you lock lips.
That first kiss — oh, sometimes so magical! Other times it's completely evident that it will be the last. There are the passionate, let's-rip-each-other's-clothes-off type kisses, and then there are the perfunctory, seemingly meaningless pecks on the cheek. Some folks just want to bypass the kissing and get to the more physical activities. And, once they get there, kissing can serve to either enhance or interrupt. What's in a kiss for you?
When it's mutual, locking lips can be divine. I am a man who enjoys kissing, and kissing heightens my romantic experience. However, I've had partners for whom kissing just wasn't that important, leaving me to wonder whether I might be doing something wrong. Fortunately, I've been told enough times that I'm a good kisser, so I don't have too much concern. What I've found is that with kissing, like with many things, it's important to define wants, needs and desires as well as boundaries. What's in a kiss for you? Study Says Doing This Simple Thing Will Make Your Man Really Happy
I once dated a woman who tried to touch my heart with her tongue. While she was clearly passionate, I was suffocated by a tongue that had me on my heels. It wasn't pleasant. I mentioned my discomfort to her and she agreed to tone it down. Yet, a couple weeks later, when we had grown closer and she brought the same passion during an intense physical encounter, it worked magnificently. What's in a kiss for you?
I am not one that prefers an overly wet kiss, though, once again, there have been a few instances when passion takes over and things get a little sloppy. I think success in kissing is definitely about communication. I am usually very quick to let a partner know that I enjoy kissing, and that I enjoy kissing often. It's good to start slow to make sure that comfort is there. What I have discovered is that women want to feel safe, so a fast approach often doesn't work well. However, there are certainly women who bring an increased energy to making out, and an aware man can catch on and act accordingly. What's in a kiss for you? How Often Married Couples Kiss, According To Research
How do we act when kissing seems inappropriate? For instance, like in a public place or in the presence of certain friends or even when an ex is in the midst. I've watched men and women use kissing as a way to secure their partner when competition is around. Is kissing right around children? There is an important element of responsibility with intimacy to consider. Too many times we watch young lovers oblivious to decorum and accountability for their actions is utterly absent. I know the excitement, passion and sometimes danger of intimacy in public can be quite a turn-on. What's in a kiss for you?
More Juicy Content From YourTango:
- Kissing Makes You Live Longer (And 9 Other Surprising Facts!)
- 7 Steamy Ways To Make Lust Last A Very, Very Long Time
- How To Kiss So Well They Never Forget You
Kissing is a universal symbol of love and affection. It is done in celebration and to express care for loved ones. Some of us shy ones like to keep it behind closed doors. How many times have you cried when watching that first kiss at a wedding or at the end of a movie when the moment of redemption has occurred? It indicates that love is pure and sacred. It's the sweet knowing that love is alive – maybe not always for ourselves at the moment, but that there is hope. A kiss speaks peace, calm and serenity; it can tell us that we are safe. It says hello and goodbye, sometimes forever. We kiss babies because their love is so innocent. We are kissed because we are loved; that is for certain. What's in a kiss for you?