Why Your Online Dating Profile Doesn't Work
Learn the three ways your profile works against you.
If you are using online dating, you probably have noticed that it is much more difficult to meet good quality men than you thought it would be. Right? So why is it that some women can meet one quality guy after another and other women attract nothing but perverts and losers? Is it possible that there are underlying causes which are responsible for these discrepancies? Well, I believe there is.
Now, before I go any further let me say I am a huge advocate of online dating. Believe it or not, I actually met my wife on match.com over 13 years ago. At that time online dating was relatively new and had a stigma much greater than it is today. The reason I am such a huge advocate of online dating, apart from the obvious, is because I think it is one of the best ways to meet good quality matches. Can you think of another way of meeting lots of potential dates without ever leaving your home or office? Why I Would Remove "Love" From The Dictionary
Yes, there are inherent risks of meeting someone online. But if you really look at it, those risks are no different than meeting someone in the "real world." A person could lie and misrepresent himself just as easily if you met him out at a club. That is why I like online dating. If you know how to do it right, if you know how to screen men properly, if you know what questions to ask and you know how to spot the red flags, it becomes much easier to make online dating an enjoyable and productive experience.
Herein lies the problem. Most individuals who are using online dating are doing it absolutely wrong. Online dating is very similar to joining a gym. Just because you sign up for a membership does not mean that you are going to get results. If a person signs up for the gym and isn't getting in shape, it isn't the gym's fault is it?
Well, joining an online dating site and putting up a profile does not mean that you are going to meet the man (or woman) of your dreams. How do I know most people are doing it wrong? Because of the results and the experience they are getting. The majority of people using online dating are not having a favorable experience and they are not meeting the numbers and quality of potential matches that they would like. The Hidden Dangers Of Online Dating
There are several things a person needs to do to put themself in a position to win the online dating game. One of the most important things is to create a good profile. I've discovered that there are 3 major mistakes most online daters make in their profile. These mistakes are the main reason a person doesn't attract the type of person and number of people that they thought they would when they decided to join the online dating site.
Mistake #1: Wrong Picture
Research shows that in online dating, most men literally decide within 15 seconds if they find a woman interesting and if they want to pursue her. The first thing a guy looks at is the picture. Now, contrary to popular belief, not all men are looking for the picture of a supermodel. "The Greatest Love Of All"
In fact, those guys who are looking for a relationship are simply seeing if they find the woman attractive. As long as the guy thinks the woman is attractive, he will proceed. If however, the picture sends a mixed message or makes the guy believe the woman is hiding something or not truly representing herself, he will move on to the next profile immediately.
It is also important to understand that the message you intend to send out is often different than the interpretation of the guy who is looking at your picture. You may think posting a picture with a seductive look on your face or showing major cleavage is sexy, but the guy who is looking at your picture is probably interpreting it differently. 3 Tips For Online Dating Beginners
Mistake #2: Wrong Headline
It is essential to understand the importance of a good headline on your profile. Since a guy is usually reading dozens of profiles at a time, you only have a few seconds to grab his attention. Just like in newspapers and magazines, the headlines are meant to grab a person's attention and make them want to know more. If you write a headline that makes the guy silently say to himself, "Hmm, that's interesting, that makes me want to know more" or "That's what I'm looking for," you have a greater chance of grabbing his attention and making him want to read the rest of your profile.
The best way to create a great and magnetic profile is to design your headline as a question which addresses his biggest frustration and problems. To see some examples of good headlines simply pick up a Cosmo Magazine and notice the headlines on the cover. These companies spend millions on marketing and understanding what catches a person's attention and causes them to take action. So, why not borrow their tactics and make them work for you? The Dumbest Mistake Smart Women Make When It Comes To Finding Love
Mistake #3: Wrong Intention
The biggest mistake I see people make in writing their profiles is that they write them as if they are trying to "sell" themselves. A well written profile does not sell, but instead makes the guy want to "buy." This subtle shift makes a huge difference in how attractive a profile becomes to a guy. Think about it ...
Does the guy really care that you like the beach, love your dog, and love to go to the movies and curl up on the couch? No! What he cares about is how you are going to make him happy and make his life better. If you write your profile in a way that makes him think that you both are on the same page, and that he will be happy, and his life will be better with you, you have a much greater chance of making that guy reach out and contact you. How To Let Your Guard Down Without Getting Hurt
You must remember your profile isn't about you. It's about him! When you write your profile, write it as if you are trying to get the attention of the specific guy you are looking for. If you write your profile with this intention, you will increase the quality of the types of guys who are interested in you, and when you start attracting a better quality of men, your attitude and experience quickly begins to change for the better.
If you are currently using online dating and have been frustrated with the results (or lack there of) you might want to look over your profile and see if you are making any of these common mistakes. If you are, simply see what changes you can make, and then go make them. I am confident that if you do, you will see that online dating, if done right, can be a great source of dating. 3 Tiny Ways You're Unknowingly Sabotaging Your Love Life
If you have been struggling in your love life and you are ready to reclaim your power in the dating game, I would like to invite you to follow us at http://www.SmarterDatingforWomen.com. And while you're there, make sure to grab a free copy of my e-book: The ABC's of Smarter Dating: 26 Tips & Strategies to Immediately Improve Your Love Life
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