The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly Of Instant Sexual Chemistry
Yes, it's hot. But will it last? Find out.
getty She is like a drug.
Having a strong sexual attraction can be undeniably intoxicating. You are hooked on her like an addict. The sensation is so suspenseful and gratifying that you can’t walk away from her. She is the blood that keeps your heart pumping.
You constantly find yourself looking her up and down, fixating on her eternal glow. You are so delightfully infatuated, you forget about anything other than your sexual desires. You might even think it's love at first sight.
You enjoy the chase but it's like kryptonite.
Every time you see her, you want to smell her, touch her, and press your body up against hers. You are so high on her vibe that nothing can distract you away from her. You continuously find yourself craving her more and more.
She has literally invaded your subconscious. Here’s what to expect when your relationship thrives on instant sexual attraction and love at first sight:
The good:
Selecting a partner can be a bewitching process. When you initiate a relationship on sexual attraction, it can simplify your choice and save you a lot of time on your love quest. Not only are things effortless, but seeking a pleasurable bond falls nothing short of a euphoric experience.
There’s a powerful sensation that comes with exploring your manhood and being sexually aroused by the quintessential woman.
First impressions happen in seconds, so leaving a hedonism imprint is vital.
Even when the connection starts as pure sex, there is still potential for it to develop into a fulfilling loving relationship over time. Successfully fulfilling your mate’s sexual fantasies begins with an honest and open dialogue about each other’s needs.
A candid dialogue is the root of any friendship; a connection can grow beyond the bedroom. Once you find yourself laughing at her jokes, craving her wisdom, and creating a loving attachment you will begin to think about her on a level far more superior than sexual pleasure.
Slowly, but indefinitely, you fall in love with everything about her and the focus is no longer about the sexual attraction. It turns into wanting to make sure she’s happy, giving her the love she craves and compromising into compatible partners.
The bad:
Being physically mesmerized by a woman leads to exploring your sexuality with her. As for men, it’s instinctively innate to select a spellbinding woman based on her beauty alone; neglecting all other key relationship characteristics.
In fact, you dive headfirst into the relationship, knowing she will be sexually satisfying to your needs, giving your ego a gratifying boost, making your guy friends jealous, and a ride-or-die passion that will stimulate you endlessly.
Although, when your relationship thrives on sexual attraction alone, you will find yourself driving into an abyss. A connection thriving solely on the surface can only meet your physical needs and nothing more.
Focusing on sexual exploration can be fun and open your imagination to a whole new world of thrill, but at some point, there will be a shift in the dynamic with nowhere left to turn. And, when this desire is unfilled you’ll begin to look elsewhere for to fulfill the void; she will too.
It's inevitable that, as humans, we desire a deeper sensation than sex.
Sexual attraction is not powerful enough to bond you together for a lifetime. You may feel emotionally safe keeping things light-hearted, however, the repetition of hooking up eventually begins to wear off over time.
The intense sexual energy can cause a havoc because one of you is bound to want something more. And when that occurs, one mate drops the other like a bad habit. Making them feel as though someone shoved a dagger straight into their heart.
The ugly:
Sexual attraction isn’t all that it’s meant to be. Things can go south pretty quickly in a matter of a split second if someone’s sexual needs are dismissed during a nightly make out session.
At any point, the dynamic can begin to shift because there’s no firm foundation to solidify the connection. And if your needs trump the woman’s needs, she is unlikely to fulfill your needs next time around.
Despite living on a sexual adrenaline high, it’s not sustainable for a healthy long-lasting relationship. Your emotional needs are unlikely to be fulfilled; therefore keeping yourself detached.
You end up robbing yourself of a genuine companionship you wholeheartedly desire deep within. And, while the thought of facing your fears of emotional attachment is too much to bear, you end up hurting yourself in the end anyway.
You feel lonelier than before the sexual escapade began.
The minute you hit a hard place, bouncing back will most likely fall short. It’s much harder to make things work when you only have sexual attraction.
Without emotional intimacy, you cannot sustain or buffer against relationship ups and downs. And the last thing you want is to miss her when it’s all said and done.
Jan and Jillian Yuhas are Relationship and Lifestyle Coaches who help single guys confidently captivate and attract the woman of their dreams for a long-lasting relationship. If dating has thrown you for a loop, then contact Entwined Lifestyle to join their Men’s Love Coaching program.