Scheduling Sex In Your Marriage Isn't As Bad As It Sounds (Here's Why)
Don't stop doing the deed.
getty Couples in relationships and marriage want nothing more than the best romantic sex but how do you achieve it when there's so much going on?
While having amazing sex is something that happens almost every day at the beginning of a relationship, it is an activity that often becomes less part of a relationship the longer two people are together.
This is quite unfortunate, especially when you consider the intimate connection that two people share during sexual intercourse.
One particular problem that couples often face when it comes to their sex lives would be the fact that their lives become so busy, that sex is an activity that seems to be last on the list most days.
Once married, many couples start to think about becoming a family — and this usually involves children.
Children take up a lot of time and effort, leaving the couple too tired to have sex. Additionally, work and many other responsibilities take up so much time.
Scheduling sex in your busy married life often seems like the only way to make sure you and your partner are able to have some intimate time. But, for many couples, the idea of putting sex on the calendar seems unromantic and boring.
But, scheduling sex can still be romantic and fun.
A report by Huffington Post explains that once married, many couples only have sex once a week — sometimes even less — and that this activity often becomes something that is not as important to the couple anymore.
Having sex is beneficial and helps two people in a relationship continue to share intimacy. This can be quite tough to uphold when there are too many tasks on your schedule.
Even though it may feel like scheduling sex is unpleasant, there is no need to let the fact that you might need to start scheduling your intimate time to ruin your sex life.
If you go about the process of scheduling sex the right way, then there is no need for confusion, misunderstandings or problems when it comes to maintaining the spark in your relationship.
To improve your marriage and relationship by scheduling the best and most romantic sex, there take these two simple steps.
1. Open communication
The first step to ensuring that the scheduling of sex does not interfere with the intimacy and romance of you and your partner’s sex life is to have open communication.
Bring up the topic in a conversation with your partner, but not in such a way that they may think you are not satisfied with them in the bedroom.
Be considerate when talking to your partner and listen to what they have to say. If they are not in full agreement with you, talk about the differences you two may have.
It is important that both you and your partner agrees that scheduling sex would not cause negative effects on your relationship. Talk about the fact that both you and your partner have busy schedules, and that scheduling sex can help you two make sure there is enough time for intimacy in your relationship.
2. Schedule sex
After you and your partner mutually agree on the fact that it might be a good idea to schedule sex, it is time to add it to your schedule. There is no need to make it too official.
For example, agree that you will go to bed early on Friday nights — book a movie night for you and your partner. You can watch some fun movies together, switch it all off, and then spend some intimate time together in bed.
Maybe schedule your Sunday afternoons so that you and your partner can spend some time together. Perhaps, even schedule out a couple of minutes on Monday morning — even if it’s just for a quickie. This will give you and your partner a great start to the new week — every week.
In addition to these ideas, there are ways to include romance in your scheduled sexual activities. Schedule a date night every week, and make this night special. One week, you can cook, the next week your partner can cook.
Start things out slow and don’t overlook the importance of foreplay as a path to great sex.
Foreplay is vital if you truly want to ensure every sexual session is intimate, especially if your partner is struggling with an issue such as sexual pain disorder or low libido, as this can help to get both of you "in the mood", and create more intimacy and romance during sex.
Donna Begg is an expert editor, a mentor, analyst, and a researcher.