10 Things Guys Should Do During (And After) A First Date — If They Want A Second
Here's how to get that second date.
Fotoindy | svetikd | Getty Images / Elena Photo | Canva So you went out on a first date with the woman you've been crushing on, and you thought she was absolutely amazing.
You definitely want to see her again — a lot — but you're not totally confident you know how to get a girl to like you, let alone get her to be your girlfriend.
How can you successfully ask her out on a second date and capitalize on the heels of that great first one?
If you want to know how to get her to like you, here are my 10 best during and after the first date tips for men that are (almost) guaranteed to get you that second date.
Here are 10 things guys should do during, and after, a first date — if they ever want a second:
1. Ask her out at the end of the first date for a second date
When asking her out at the end of the date, be sure to ask her to do something she told you during the date she finds exciting.
For example, if she likes Mexican food, tell her you know the best Mexican restaurant in town and you want to bring her there Tuesday night. Set that second date up so she doesn’t have time to think about the first date, and so she has something to look forward to.
2. Text or call her the very next day
Either text her a simple message that says “Had a great time last night. Looking forward to the next time.” Or, call her and leave a message and tell her the same thing over the phone. Don't try to be coy by waiting a day or two to follow up.
3. Don’t expect intimacy or force the issue of being intimate
Take things slow and enjoy getting to know each other. There are no rules about when to be intimate for the first time with a new potential partner.
You’re both adults and if a woman decides that she doesn’t want to be intimate with you for a month, respect her. Or, if a woman decides she wants to be physical with you on the first date, respect that decision, too.
When you two are intimate, make sure that the two of you handle it like adults and not like children.
4. Be positive and fun when you’re out with her
Don’t bash your exes. Don’t complain about all the things that are wrong in your life.
Spend time getting to know each other’s good sides.
5. Listen to her
Question things that don’t sound right. Have a two-sided conversation instead of talking at her.
Most men tend to want to impress women based on their accomplishments. Women enjoy getting to know a man based on what’s inside. So spend time listening and having a conversation instead of bragging about yourself. The less you brag, the more interested she will be.
6. Don't check out other women in front of her
Do this, and you’ll never get another date with her again.
7. Compliment her once about the way she looks
Don’t tell her all night long how beautiful she is or she may start to think that you’ve never before been out with a woman as beautiful as her, and you’ll start to lose your intrigue.
8. Instead of complimenting her looks, compliment her mind
Bond with her mentally emotionally and physically, and she will bond with you in ways that you’ve never experienced before.
9. Don’t agree with everything she says
Challenge her mind — don’t just agree with her.
If you agree with everything she says, she’ll look at you as being weak. If she sees you as being weak, she will no longer be attracted to you and you will no longer get a second look or a second date.
I’m not telling you to be confrontational. I’m telling you to be open, honest, and real.
10. Once you’ve secured the second date, and the second date is successful, set up an “activity date” for date number three
Take her to the park, go to the beach, or take your dogs for a long walk.
Do things that cause her to picture the two of you as a couple. Dates should be creative, not boring. Sitting there and swapping stories over dinner tends to get monotonous after date number one, so start creatively planning different dates so the two of you can start to get to know each other in a very different manner.
Follow these tips, and I assure you that you will get to see her again after that first date far more than you have in the past.
David Wygant is a dating coach who spent the past 20 years helping men and women transform their love lives. As a lead writer for Ask Men and Huffington Post, his advice has been offered across television, newspapers, and magazines, including MTV, The New York Times, MSNBC, Fox News, Cosmopolitan, Men's Health, E! Entertainment Television, and more.