Navigating Your Divorce

Divorce is the most emotionally devastating life transition you can experience, second only to the loss of a loved one. That's a pretty powerful statement. It makes sense that you are not yourself or that you are on edge. Perhaps you feel filled with uncertainty and fear of what the future holds or feel that you are drowning in anger and resentment when you are normally a happy person. One of the difficult things we face in divorce is the loneliness and separation not only from our spouse, but often from our community of married friends. We no longer socialize as a couple and what we have had in common begins to change. As a result you may feel lost, that somewhere along the road you went astray and now, in the midst of the storm, don't know how to get back on course.

All these feelings are perfectly understandable; your fears and emotions are normal. Take a moment to congratulate yourself for having the strength to persevere. As with all difficulties, you can use this season as an opportunity to tap into your spirituality — to draw from your faith with the belief that there is a light at the end of the tunnel, and that the sun will shine bright upon you again. If you broaden your perspective, you will find the silver lining, the angels dropping in your path and the gifts that will emerge like diamonds in the rough, but it requires you to look beyond your hurt and anger. Shift your focus from what is wrong to what is working.

Divorce is undoubtedly a dramatic transition, but it does not have to be all bad. Out of every challenge or difficulty we can find opportunities, even beautiful gifts; it's all within our control to create our reality. Each moment describes who we are and gives us the opportunity to decide if that's who we want to be. Are you presently who you want to be?

What has been your experience with divorce and transforming your life as a result? I'd like to hear your story.