Woman Reveals That Her Date Asked To Split The Bill — When She Refused To Pay, He Showed Up At Her House
It's a scary reality for many women out in the dating world these days.
@ivnursefran / TikTok A woman has shared the frightening experience she had after going on a first date with a man. In a TikTok video, Fran explained that she had gone out with a guy that she assumed was nice and appeared to be friendly; however, she was shortly proved wrong once it came time to pay the bill.
Her fate found her address and showed up at her house after she refused to split the restaurant bill.
In Fran's video, she had stitched her initial reveal about going on a first date with a guy that she didn't know previously, but while out with him, he had ordered a pricey amount of food that she didn't feel comfortable paying for since she hadn't eaten or ordered it herself.
"POV: you went on a first date with a guy who ordered $200 more than you did and then asked you to split the bill so you went to the bathroom and never came back," she wrote in overlay text. However, the situation quickly turned scary after her date ended up showing up at her house.
While Fran didn't divulge what her date hoped to accomplish by showing up to her door unannounced, it appeared that he was upset about her leaving the date, despite her having more than a right to do so. She followed up on the incident with more details, explaining that she was forced to call the front desk of her building to have him kicked out.
"I had to call security to get him escorted out of my building," Fran recalled. She pointed out that she'd never told the man where she lived, she had met him at the restaurant and they didn't have any mutual friends in common, so she deduced that he must've found her address online.
"He seemed totally normal on the date, but after you asked me to pay 50% of the bill when you rack up $200 more than I did, it's not gonna fly with me," she continued. "I'm literally gonna get up."
Fran acknowledged that once she had gotten home, she made sure to send the man the money for her portion of the meal through Venmo. "This stuff doesn't fly with me, I'm not okay with it. If you wanna spend time with me and invest yourself in me, or invest your time in me, pay for the dinner."
Fran's experience highlights how this type of behavior can quickly lead to terrifying incidents of violence.
Incidents like the one Fran described often contribute to the fear and unease that many women feel just existing in their everyday lives. When women experience situations where their boundaries are not respected, it reinforces the fear that their decisions and autonomy could be disregarded in other, potentially more dangerous contexts.
According to the National Violence Against Women Survey of information collected by 8,000 women and men in the United States, it was found that at least 8% of women have been stalked at some point in their lives. On top of that, per the World Health Organization, almost one in three women across the world has experienced some form of gender-based violence at least once in their lifetime.
While Fran was able to diffuse the situation and have the man escorted out of her building, there are thousands upon thousands of similar stories that have ended tragically for women. These frightening statistics and the countless experiences of women facing aggression and violence from men, whether they are rejecting unwanted romantic advances or asserting themselves, highlight a need for a safer society.
Women shouldn't have to worry about their addresses being found by strangers online and for them to show up unprompted to their homes. Women shouldn't have to worry about saying no to a man who asks for their phone numbers or having to switch routes for fear of being catcalled and followed.
These issues affect countless women worldwide, and they manifest in various forms, from stalking to physical violence, and should never be a normal or inevitable part of a woman's life.
Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news, and lifestyle writer whose work delves into modern-day issues and experiences.