Exasperated Woman Is Tired Of Her Friend Bringing Her Teenage Daughters On All Of Their Outings — 'She Acts Like Her Daughters Are Our Best Friends'
"I’m sick of being expected to act with awe and interest when I expected to have a laugh and cocktails with friends."
Pressmaster / Nicoleta Ionescu / Shutterstock A woman has expressed her frustration over not being able to spend one-on-one time with one of her closest friends.
Posting to the subreddit "r/childfree" — an online public forum where people who choose to not have children can have a place to discuss topics related to that — a woman in her 30s revealed that one of her friends had children when she was fairly young, but now brings her teenage daughters everywhere.
The woman admitted that she's tired of her friend bringing her teenage daughters on all of their outings.
In her Reddit post, she explained that now, her friend's teenage daughters, who are both 15 and 17, are constantly with them whenever they choose to hang out.
"The girls are quite young and immature in some ways for their age and have been spoilt rotten and always get their own way," she admitted. "If we go anywhere in my friends' car I’m told to sit in the back and they turn Taylor Swift on at such a loud volume it’s impossible for me to talk to my friend."
Photo: DimaBerlin / Shutterstock
She claimed that anything she and her mom-friend want to do has to be suitable enough for her teen daughters to join them. Whenever she and her friend make reservations to go out to dinner, they are always changed last minute to include more people since she brings her daughters along.
"It’s impossible to have any kind of conversation because the girls either demand to join in and insist on giving their opinions on everything," she continued. She pointed out that she isn't keen on having discussions about her relationship, mental health, financial worries, or even making silly jokes about their youth because of having teenagers around.
She acknowledged that she "hates" having to censor herself, and while she trusts her friends, she knows her friend's daughters won't think twice about discussing her private matters with their friends.
She's tried to ask her friend to meet her alone and without the company of her daughters.
"This is my best friend of 28 years and it’s a relatively new thing that she’s bringing them everywhere," she added in her post. "She used to be very strict with them but now my friend is acting like her daughters are our best friends."
She ranted about how her friends' daughters have other friends and don't understand why they choose to hang out with her and their mom instead of people their own age whom they would have more things in common with.
She even tried to bring this up to her friend, who agreed that she would start meeting her alone, but then would show up with her daughters and claim that their plans fell through so now they are going to be joining them.
"I don’t want to lose my friend and it’s not a good idea to be totally honest and say it’s disappointing every time she brings them," she stressed. "I’ve had other friends bring babies and toddlers to meet-ups when they have childcare. I’m sick of being expected to act with awe and interest when I expected to have a laugh and cocktails with friends."
This woman's frustrations are valid and shed light on the complicated dynamics that can happen between friends with children and friends who don't have them.
While family is undoubtedly a priority, the importance of quality time in friendships should not be underestimated either. Her annoyance stems from the loss of quality time due to the continuous presence of her friend's teenagers, when all she wants is to be able to have a moment alone with her friend.
It's not an easy feat, being able to balance parenting with having a social life, but this woman's kids are teenagers, and can easily hang out with each other or with their friends.
Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news, and lifestyle writer whose work delves into modern-day issues and experiences.