Woman Says Her Baby Niece Was Dropped At Her Home By A Stranger & Now Her Sister Claims She 'Stole Her'
She's the hero in this story.
AV RAW / Pexels When a woman offered to look after her sister’s neglected daughter, she never could have imagined that one day she would be accused of “stealing” the baby.
However, this is exactly what happened to her after she attempted to reconnect her niece with her biological mother — who had disappeared from her life months ago.
The woman’s sister is claiming that she 'stole' her daughter after taking her in.
Posting her story on the subreddit, "r/AmItheA-–hole (AITA), the woman asked other Redditors if she was wrong for pursuing appropriate actions to obtain legal guardianship of her niece after her sister abandoned her.
The 29-year-old woman began her post by sharing that she has a 21-year-old sister, Jane.
Jane has a 14-month-old daughter, Sara, whom she has had custody of since June.
She explains that Sara had a difficult home life, with Jane in the process of divorcing her husband, unemployed and homeless.
“I offered to take temporary guardianship of Sara so she would be safe and cared for while Jane got her life together,” the woman wrote.
Jane initially rejected the woman’s offer.
“However, after Sara was dropped off at our mom's house in dirty clothes and an old diaper by a stranger while she was supposed to be under the care of her father, Jane agreed to give her to me and my wife,” the woman revealed.
Since taking Sara in, the woman has made it clear to her sister that it was a temporary arrangement and that she could gain custody of her daughter back whenever she feels ready.
Shortly after, Sara's mother was nowhere to be found.
Over the last six months, the woman claims that Jane has disappeared from Sara’s life and has made no effort to take the necessary steps to raise her.
“She doesn't ask about her, she doesn't make any effort to visit her. She doesn't ask us to bring her to visit,” the woman wrote.
“[She doesn’t] take any financial responsibility, not even in the form of buying her gifts. She doesn't call to talk to her or see her.”
The woman added that Jane recently got a new job and is living in an unsafe area.
The woman called her sister to speak with her on the matter, who defended her reasons for not seeing or checking in on Sara.
“Her defense is that it's too emotionally hurtful to see Sara because of how much it hurts and how much she misses her,” the woman wrote.
“Her other excuse is that she doesn't have a car or enough money to buy Ubers or diapers.”
The woman argued that Jane’s claims were “ridiculous” since money isn't required to send a text or call and that she and her wife have offered to drive Sara to her place so she could see her.
“Even after speaking to her about the things she should or could be doing, she still has made no changes,” the woman revealed. “Because of this, my wife and I have decided to look into our legal options for adoption.”
The woman claims that Sara has been legally abandoned and that she and her wife need to have Sara with them for just a little while longer before the courts would allow the termination of Jane and her husband’s rights to their daughter.
The woman adds that Jane’s husband is more absent from Sara’s life than she is.
However, Jane is opposed to her daughter being adopted by her sister.
“Jane is livid about this and is threatening all kinds of things (but has done nothing),” the woman wrote.
The woman's sister says she is 'stealing' her baby since she cannot have a biological child of her own.
The woman provided even more background on her family to explain why Jane then accused her of “stealing” her baby.
The woman shares that before she had physical custody of Sara, she and her wife went through a failed round of IVF.
“I told Jane about this on day one just so that there would be full honesty and so that none of this would seem sneaky if it were to come out later,” the woman wrote.
“Jane is bringing this up in a very hurtful way during all this saying that I am trying to steal her baby since we can't have one of our own (we have one adopted son already).”
The woman claims that this is “far from the truth” as she and her wife are genuinely concerned about Sara’s well-being and feel that they have the right to guardianship since her biological mother essentially abandoned her.
The woman added that she cannot afford to take Jane in to live with them as well, since they are tight on money and space as it is with the new baby and that Jane’s focus needs to be on ensuring that she improves her life for Sara’s sake.
Redditors supported the woman’s decision to pursue the legal adoption of Sara.
"I am an adopted kid. My mom was a drug addict and knew she wouldn’t get her life together," one user shared. "Bide your time, make your case open and close, and then formally adopt your daughter. I wish you all the best!"
"Keep communication open, even just some pictures, but you and your wife need to ultimately decide what's the best, as you know your niece/daughter best," another user suggested.
"Saying you stole Sara is just Jane's way of abandoning her child while absolving herself of the guilt," a third user wrote. "I imagine the emotions there are pretty complicated."
"Stop worrying about Jane or looking bad and take comfort in the fact that you are doing what is best for Sara. Anyone who believes Jane over you isn't worth having on your team anyway. Good luck!"
Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.