Stay-At-Home Dad Calls His Wife 'Crazy' After Refusing To Follow Her Demanding Cleaning Schedule
All of the 'demands' are normal household chores.
Natalia Lebedinskaia / Shutterstock A healthy partnership is all about give and take, especially when it comes to keeping a clean and tidy home. One partner does the dishes while the other cleans the bathroom. One partner is in charge of taking out the trash while the other does the laundry.
But sometimes, both partners don't agree on what type of cleaning is needed for their home, with some opting to tidy every few days or weeks versus daily. That's the predicament one man found himself in after a major fight with his wife.
A man called his wife 'crazy' and refused to follow her demanding cleaning schedule.
In a Reddit post, the man wrote that his wife, who he's been married to for three years, likes things in their home to be clean all the time. But after a recent major fight, he ended up calling her "crazy" because of the way in which she wants their home cleaned.
"She hates dishes in the sink while I'm content to let them sit for a couple [of] days. She spends her off days scrubbing bathrooms because in her mind they should be cleaned weekly," he explained. "She doesn’t let me bring my shoes inside and insists I shower immediately when I get home before laying in bed."
The couple has two children together, a 2-year-old and a 1-year-old, and since their youngest was born, he has been a stay-at-home dad. While he's at home with the kids, his wife expects him to pick up all the chores and make sure everything is in order while she works, which he finds unreasonable.
According to him, his wife expects him to bathe the children every day, while he argues they should only be bathed every couple of days. She also wants him to make sure all the dishes are washed, the bedding around the house is cleaned weekly, the floors are vacuumed and mopped, and all their children's toys are put away.
"Because I don’t play along with most of her demands, she ends up being the one to do most of the housework when she gets home or [on] her rare off days," he added. So, instead of making sure all the chores are done since his wife works "40 to 80 hours a week," she ends up doing most of them herself.
His wife eventually reached her breaking point when she discovered he had not completed any of the tasks she asked him to take care of.
When she returned home after work one day and noticed that not only were there still dishes that hadn't been washed and pans on the counter with food still on them, but that he also hadn't brought in the trash cans as she'd asked from two days ago, she became infuriated.
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"She flew off the handle calling me lazy and a slob. She said she would like for me to return to work since in her eyes I’m doing a poor job and use the money to hire a weekly housekeeper and a nanny," the man said.
She added that he also isn't supposed to let their children stay in their pajamas all day without getting bathed. In return, he called his wife "crazy" for getting herself worked up over things that he deems aren't that big of a deal and refused to hire a nanny, arguing that he won't leave his children in the company of someone he doesn't know.
Since their fight, his wife "packed her bags" and took their children with her to stay at her mother's house.
Most people agreed that the man was incredibly wrong and out of touch for his actions. They mentioned that all the duties and chores he's in charge of are normal for a stay-at-home parent. Other users called the man out for making his wife feel uncomfortable in her own home, urging him to find a reasonable compromise.
There's been a long-standing debate about how husbands tend to not contribute as much to household chores.
Whether it's holding stereotypical beliefs about masculinity, not knowing where to start in terms of cleaning and tidying, or using weaponized incompetence, there are myriad reasons why men admit they don't do much around the house.
And even though men may think they are contributing enough, many women don't feel that way.
A 2021 Pew Research Center study found that 59% of women say they do more chores in the home than their partner, with only 6% saying their partner does more housework. For men, 46% said they shared responsibilities, while 34% said their partner does more, and 20% claimed they did more than their partner.
But this isn't the only study to make these claims. A Gender Equality Index study from 2021 determined that employed women spend 2.3 hours daily on chores, while employed men only spend 1.6 hours on housework. Additionally, 91% of women with children spend at least one hour per day on housework, compared to only 30% of men with children.
In the end, the man eventually updated his post, saying, "The common belief is I need to help more around the house. I'll see what I can do and apologize to my wife." Though it's unknown if he actually did increase his household duties and apologize for calling his wife names and making her feel uncomfortable in their home, it serves as a great reminder for all couples.
Be sure to always help out around the home, even if your partner doesn't ask you directly. It might end up saving your relationship in the process.
Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news, and lifestyle writer whose work delves into modern-day issues and experiences.