Podcaster Defends Why She Asks Men To See Their Bank Accounts On The First Date
She's sparked a debate about the importance of shared priorities in relationships.
@sofirafranklyn The dating scene can certainly be hectic, but you can expect everyone to be searching for one thing specifically — a person with similar values as them. Sometimes, those values come in the form of dollar signs and career goals.
Host of the “Sofia With An F” Podcast, Sofia Franklyn, recently revealed that there’s one thing that she asks for from the men she’s dating before getting too deep into the relationship.
Sofia Franklyn asks the men she’s dating for their bank account information on the first date.
During the “Sofia With An F” episode that was released on August 24, 2023, Franklyn revealed to Leo Skepi that for the last three men she has dated, she asked for this information. “I'm not joking. I have asked the last 3 dudes I've dated for their bank account info on the first date,” she said in the video, uploaded to TikTok.
Skepi, a fellow influencer, answered back by reserving his judgments. “I don't judge people's actions, I look at the intention behind it. So, like, why do you ask for that?”
It seems like the general public perception of people who find material wealth to be the most important thing in a relationship is that they’re selfish, but Franklyn reveals her reason behind the choice.
“Because I only wanna date a wealthy guy that has money,” she says, which at first sounds shallow, but it makes a lot of sense why she’s looking for someone with money — she knows her own worth. “I think, you know, I have a job, I'm very successful, so I think I have every [expletive] right to be like, ‘hi, are we on the same level or am I wasting my time?’”
Skepi says, “Valid. So you're getting straight to the point,” but many people in the comments did not believe it to be a valid reason at all.
“Could have a billion dollars, if she asks this I’m leaving and not paying for the date lol,” one person said. Someone else wrote, “Someone else responded with “When you talk to an old married couple at no point do they talk about money. Memories, kids, possibly grandkids, friends, trips, funny stories.”
A third person asked, “You have tons of money, why does it matter what he makes?” and the answer to this question is exactly why her reasoning is completely sound and valid.
Franklyn wants someone with ambition whose career goals align with hers.
It’s entirely normal and healthy to want a partner who has a similar work ethic to you. If you’re an ambitious person who likes to dream big and reach for the stars, you probably don’t want to be with someone who is going to hold you down and bring you back to Earth.
For Franklyn, it doesn’t seem to be about “gold-digging,” instead, she just wants someone who’s going to match her energy — or even her bank account — and that’s a completely valid request.
Similarly, anyone that wants to prioritize other things in their partner, they’re completely valid as well. All some people ask for is someone who’s nice to them, and that’s okay. While everyone who’s single (or ethical non-monogamists, we see you) is on the hunt for a new partner, whatever they’re searching for is a matter of subjectivity.
No matter how superficial it may seem, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and Franklyn shouldn’t be criticized for wanting someone with money like she has.
Isaac Serna-Diez is an Assistant Editor for YourTango who focuses on entertainment and news, social justice, and politics.