A Mom’s Generous Gesture For Her Family Revealed Just How Undervalued Women Are Outside Of Their Roles As Moms And Wives
Her family didn't even pretend that they wanted to take part in one of her interests.
bbernard via Shutterstock / Vunira, R via Canva In response to Isaac Butler's New York Times Op-Ed, "American Theater Is Imploding Before Our Eyes," a woman's poignant account of the alienation moms and wives often face has stirred attention.
A woman's generous gesture for her family revealed a sad dynamic female caretakers often face.
A woman named Diana commented on the op-ed to share her story about wanting to take her family to a play. She noted that she made the effort to find one that she thought would engage even the least interested of them.
"I actually bought tickets to the theater a few months ago," Diana wrote. "I carefully looked for something that might appeal to my husband and son. I found a version of the tempest with a real magician playing prospero, doing real magic tricks."
However, Diana's initial excitement was steadily replaced with a disheartening realization.
Despite taking care of all the arrangements herself so that all her family would have to do is show up, "it was clear that they would do this for me, but as passively as possible," Diana wrote. "Their faces would go into completely neutral mode whenever I spoke about it." Their indifference was felt, gnawing at the joy she initially held.
"When the day came, I just couldn't bear it... so I faked an illness and curled up in bed," Diana confessed.
Photo: Twitter via @GratuitousV
This scenario painted a somber picture of how little we value women when they're doing something for themselves instead of others.
"I think a dynamic like this is going on in many families. Most men have just decided that this is a girl's thing, and they are just not interested," Diana wrote.
Many took to Twitter, expressing their feelings over Diana's situation.
Photo: Twitter via @moorehn
"This is the saddest comment on the @nytimes opinion piece about American theater. I wish this woman had told her family she was going with a couple of girlfriends instead or was just going to enjoy an evening by herself," one woman wrote.
The sentiment also resonated with New York Times writer Sophie Vershbow, who wrote, "This genuinely makes my hear[t] break. I want so much more for heterosexual women."
Moreover, the issue touched upon the much broader institution of marriage and the isolation often experienced by women within it.
Journalist Heidi Moore addressed the larger implications of Diana's account. "When I am openly critical of marriage as an institution, it is this kind of depthless alienation that I mean. Women existing in families they started, but never supported, never acknowledged, never validated or appreciated, always lonely, drifting as invisibly as ghosts," she wrote.
Thus, Diana's struggle with alienation echoed the feelings of many women, serving as a stark reminder of the gender disparities that persist within households.
Ethan Cotler is a writer and frequent contributor to YourTango living in Boston. His writing covers entertainment, news, and human interest stories.