Mom Questions Whether She Was Right To Ground Her 11-Year-Old Daughter After She Made Her Lose Her Job
This mom felt guilty for disciplining their child, but many say she wasn't wrong for doing so.
fizkes / Shutterstock Finding herself 34 weeks pregnant and without a traditional 9-5 job, a mother sought purpose and a modest income by dog-sitting. However, after a fight with her 11-year-old daughter, she even lost that. She acted swiftly and punished her, but she was left unsure of whether that was the right course of action.
In a now deleted post, the mother shared her story on Reddit's "r/AITAH," a subreddit dedicated to people asking others if they acted appropriately in a situation.
The mom is questioning if she was right to ground her 11-year-old daughter after she made her lose her job.
"I had a 'client' who would drop her pup off at 7:30 am and pick her back up anywhere from 8-9pm," she began. Though the income wasn't substantial, around $150, it provided her with a sense of self-worth that felt "better... than just sitting home."
Her 11-year-old daughter, showing signs of self-absorption and a fixation on money following getting $40 per week in allowance, asked if she could start her dog-walking business. The mother refused, fearing for her young daughter's safety.
"I'm not having my 11yo walking the streets with dogs. I don't feel it's safe, and I physically cannot go with her as of currently," she wrote. Angry about being denied by her own mother, the daughter acted out and claimed to her dog-sitting client that she would "do a better job" and demanded payment for herself instead of her mother.
"I have the dog all day every day. My mom doesn't do anything," she said. However, this was not remotely true. "This is a bold-faced lie. She walked her once yesterday, and the rest of the time, I had the pup," the mother clarified.
But the damage had been done, and the client's reaction was decisive.
"I think we will be finding another dog-sitter for the time being, as I find what your daughter said to be concerning, and I just need to make sure that my pup is getting the best care. I hope you understand," they said.
The mother's response was to ground her daughter for a month. This punishment also involved the removal of all her electronics and not allowing her to go to her friend's party.
Photo: Yuganov Konstantin / Shutterstock
The daughter's reaction was tears and a plea of not meaning to cause harm, but the mother felt this was not the first time such behavior had occurred.
Her husband's concern was that the grounding might be 'extreme.'
However, the central issue was the daughter's growing obsession with money and a willingness to compromise relationships for a quick profit. "She insists on saving every penny she makes and has said numerous times 'I'm going to be the richest one in the family,'" she wrote.
People overwhelmingly declared that the mother did the right thing by punishing her daughter for her behavior.
"You have to stop that behavior in its tracks. Nobody likes hanging out with people who have no sense of boundaries or loyalty to the people around them," one person wrote. "Nobody trusts the person who would betray them for a quick buck. If she continues that behavior, it could seriously affect her social development and her ability to maintain relationships."
Some people even declared that everybody was in the wrong in this situation.
"You and your husband created this issue. Look at how you're talking about your own child that you raised. She's still in elementary school, clearly showing issues which warrant a therapist and the only thing you are concerned about is how it's affecting you instead of the reason behind WHY she is acting this way," one person wrote.
The mother eventually clarified that her daughter has been receiving therapy. For now, here's hoping that the mother and daughter come to some sort of understanding.
Ethan Cotler is a writer and frequent contributor to YourTango living in Boston. His writing covers entertainment, news, and human interest stories.