Lala Kent Shares How She Is Building The Family She Wants Without A 'Cookie-Cutter' Relationship
The "Vanderpumps Rules" star is content with not following the traditional norms of what a family should look like.
Eugene Powers / Shutterstock "Vanderpump Rules" star Lala Kent, 33, has just announced she's pregnant with her second child, sharing the news on Instagram. The black-and-white photo included Kent's growing baby bump with a close-up shot of her daughter, Ocean, 2, smiling as she looks up at her mother.
Kent, who shares Ocean with her ex Randall Emmett, has been vocal about her desire to give her daughter a sibling, and the reality star also expressed a desire to raise a family without fitting into the expected mold of what a family dynamic should look like.
Kent explained how she's building the family she wants without being in a 'cookie-cutter' relationship.
In an interview with Cosmopolitan, Kent shared that she is conceiving her second child via intrauterine insemination (IUI), a fertility treatment that "boosts the chances of pregnancy by placing specially prepared sperm directly in the uterus," according to the Mayo Clinic. Talking through the process of deciding to go down the IUI route, Kent admitted that she's had friends who have made the same decision.
However, a lot of Kent's friends were in "regular, normal — I call them 'cookie-cutter' relationships." For the reality star, she always knew she wanted more children and for Ocean to be able to have siblings as she continued growing up.
"It was such a strange thing that was happening because everyone would tell me, 'You're going to find somebody.' And I got to thinking, Why does my wanting more children need to involve another person? I think if there's a will, there's a way. I knew a donor was an option, and I knew IUI was an option," Kent told Cosmopolitan.
Sharing advice to women out there who want to have children but are scared because they aren't in a traditional relationship and won't be bringing a child into a two-parent household, Kent insisted that it should never be the deciding factor between having children and not having them.
"I would highly recommend it," she admitted. "If you want children and are only waiting for 'that person' to come into your life, let's talk about a different route that we can take. It's 2024! There are many ways to have a baby, and you don't need a man to do it."
Photo: Ovidiu Hrubaru / Shutterstock
According to the Census, in 2021, the majority (71%) of America's 72.3 million children under 18 lived with two parents and the next largest share (20.9%) lived with their mothers only. Of the 63.2 million parents living with their children under 18, 76.1% lived with a spouse, and 15.1% had no spouse/partner present.
There is no rule book that says individuals who want to have children need to be in a loving and healthy relationship so that their child is born into a traditional two-parent household. Any and every person should have the freedom to make decisions about parenthood based on their desires, circumstances, and personal timelines, regardless of their relationship status.
A child doesn't need to have two parents to feel loved and be loved. Families are diverse, from single-parent households, same-sex parents, co-parenting arrangements, blended families, and chosen ones as well.
An unconventional family doesn't mean that a child is missing out on the aspects of a traditional one, and a woman choosing to have a child while not in a partnership doesn't mean she doesn't have other people in her corner who are already willing to love that child.
Lala Kent isn't the only celebrity who has chosen the single-mother route instead of having kids in a relationship.
Other celebrities, including Sandra Bullock and Charlize Theron, have been open about their decisions to adopt and raise children without being in a traditional marriage or relationship — and it's something they have never regretted.
While speaking with The Independent in December 2018, Bullock, the proud parent of her son, Louis, 13, and daughter, Laila, 11, revealed how she feels about being a single mother. Bullock adopted both Louis and Laila from Louisiana in 2010 and 2015, respectively.
Photo: DFree / Shutterstock
"Society’s hard. Society still, as open-minded as we’ve become, has these rules that quietly say: 'This is the way it goes.' They’re saying: 'It’s a man and a woman, and then you have a baby, and that’s the family,'" Bullock told the publication. "I go: 'Oh my god, I’m a single parent. With a child. How am I…' I felt less than. I felt: 'I’m not the complete package.' And then I realized… this is the complete package."
Bullock insisted that it's her mission to inform others of the realization that she came to and that it "breaks my heart" when she sees people say that others can't become parents on their own or have what she has. She questions why that is and why being a single mother is so frowned upon.
"My life went the way it went because it was supposed to be that way," she admitted. "Sometimes you have to open up your mind and wait. I can say that because I see the bigger picture, but when you’re in it, you’re like: 'When is my family coming?' I was there. I know what that feels like. And at some point, you almost let go of the idea, and when you do, all of a sudden the universe goes: 'Oh, you finally let go? Here you go. This is it.'"
Similarly, Charlize Theron began her motherhood journey in 2012 when she adopted her daughter Jackson, 11. Three years later, Theron adopted her younger daughter, August, 7, in 2015.
During a 2020 podcast episode of "InCharge with Diane von Furstenberg," Theron reminisced about the heartwarming moment when August claimed that her mother needed a boyfriend.
Smiling, the "Atomic Blonde" actress told her youngest daughter, "Actually, I don’t. Right now, I feel really good. I’m in a relationship with myself." Theron explained that she is determined to shape the narrative for young girls and encourage them to be happy with themselves, whether that's in motherhood or being child-free.
"She had this look in her eye like she had never really contemplated that that was even a possibility," she said. "Her mind was blown. But, I know that was the day that she realized there was a different possibility."
Regardless of traditional norms or relationship statuses, any person, man or woman, should have the freedom to pursue their own path to parenthood because love and family come in many different forms, and we should be able to accept anyone without judgment or ridicule.
Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news, and lifestyle writer whose work delves into modern-day issues and experiences.