33 Jerry Stiller Quotes About Life — And Funny Lines From His Best Acting Roles
In remembrance of Jerry Stiller's funniest moments.
Comedian and actor, Jerry Stiller, died on Monday, May 11, 2020, at the age of 92. Born on June 8th, 1927 in Brooklyn, New York, his birth name was Gerald Isaac Stiller. Stiller grew up in New York City neighborhoods like Williamsburg and the Lower East Side. It was there, in an agent's office, where he met his future wife, Anne Meara — the two were married in 1954 until her death in 2015.
Together, Jerry and Anne were the stars in a unique comedy team known as "Stiller and Meara", and they would appear in various TV shows, including The Ed Sullivan Show.
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Jerry Stiller was part of an array of film, television shows, movies, and stage productions, including Hairspray, Seinfeld, Highway to Hell, and The King of Queens, amongst others. In 1997, Jerry Stiller earned an Emmy for his performance in Seinfeld, which he appeared in as a character named Frank Costanza from 1993 to 1998.
Jerry Stiller was the oldest of four and had two children of his own — Amy and Ben Stiller — both of whom became successful actors themselves. Jerry Stiller and his son Ben Stiller acted in a total of 11 shows together.
According to IMDb, Stiller received his bachelor's degree in speech and drama from Syracuse University and was a lifelong democrat. According to CBS News, Jerry Stiller wrote an autobiography that's titled "Married to Laughter" that talks about his marriage to Anne Meara. If you're wondering what their marriage was like, it's believed that Meara converted to Judaism for the sake of the marriage, since Stiller was Jewish and Irish. The pair had appeared on The Ed Sullivan show 36 times together, starting back in 1948.
Ben Stiller announced his father's death on Twitter Monday morning in a touching tribute, explaining that Jerry Stiller died of natural causes. It's believed that Jerry Stiller's ashes will be scattered somewhere in New York's Bear Moutain State Park.
Take a look at our picks of the best Jerry Stiller quotes below to commemorate his life.
1. "We managed to hang in there. Today when people get married, there's a tendency to run away when things get tough. There is a lot of strength in hanging together."
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2. "It can make you sad to look at pictures from your youth. So there's a trick to it. The trick is not to look at the later pictures."
3. "I don't think my judgment is that good. I don't know what is funny."
4. "During the Great Depression, when people laughed, their worries disappeared. Audiences loved these funny men. I decided to become one."
5. "Creative comedy is like growing geraniums in a minefield."
6. "My father and mother - I figured if I could make them laugh, they'd stop fighting. I stole all their material."
7. "Being on a sitcom stops me from getting Alzheimer's."
8. "Never go for the punch line. There might be something funnier on the way."
9. "Money is sensual."
10. "I've got a prostate the size of a honeydew and a head full of bad memories." — Jerry Stiller (in Zoolander)
11. "Hollywood never knew there was a Vietnam War until they made a movie."
12. "I've been around the block a lot, and I've had a merry trail for 55 years."
13. "The worst thing in this business is to be thought of as a no-talent."
14. "I loved the idea of touching base with an audience."
15. "Anne hated the idea of putting me down in front of the audience."
16. "Some of the routines come back very easily. We do it off the top of our heads."
17. "Anne is very forgiving. She doesn't care about money, being rich, or clothes. We never argued about finances."
18. "I ask myself why I do it. Maybe it's to prove I'm still around. It takes a lot out of my body. I'm not an NBA player anymore. At my age, very few people can handle it."
19. "I still haven't out what I do best yet."
20. "Educated people pronounce it catsup."
21. "But out of that, a new holiday was born. A FESTIVUS FOR THE REST-OF-US." - Frank Costanza (Jerry Stiller) from
22. "George, we've had it with you. Understand? We love you like a son, but even parents have limits." - Frank Costanza (Jerry Stiller) from Seinfeld
23. "Let me understand, you got the hen, the chicken, and the rooster. The rooster goes with the chicken. So who's having with the hen?" - Frank Costanza (Jerry Stiller) from Seinfeld
24. "I worked out with a dumbbell yesterday. I feel vigorous." - Frank Costanza (Jerry Stiller) from
25. "How long it takes to find a bra? What's going on in there? You ask me to get a pair of underwear, I'm back in two seconds... you know about the cup sizes and all? They have different cups." - Frank Costanza (Jerry Stiller) from Seinfeld
26. "Doctor gave me a relaxation cassette. When my blood pressure gets too high, the man on the tape tells me to say, 'Serenity now!'" - Frank Costanza (Jerry Stiller) from Seinfeld
27. "They don't want us there, so we're going." - Frank Costanza (Jerry Stiller) from Seinfeld
28. "Your meatloaf is mushy, your salmon croquettes are oily, and your eggplant parmesan is a disgrace to this house!" - Frank Costanza (Jerry Stiller) from Seinfeld
29. "He stopped short? That's my move. I'm gonna kill him!" - Frank Costanza (Jerry Stiller) from Seinfeld
30. "You want a piece of me?" - Frank Costanza (Jerry Stiller) from Seinfeld
31. "We are even better looking on the small screen."
32. "I don't let my feelings out. The audience brings out the part of me that wants to be funny. Maybe I want to be like that very deep down."
33. "Ah, you kids with your dieting and your health. In my day, we dropped dead of a massive coronary in our mid 50's and we liked it!"
Liz Abere is a writer who covers astrology, pop culture, and relationship topics.