6 Types Of Thirsty Men Who Will Slide Into Your DMs During Quarantine
If any of these guys message you, change your contact details.
Prostock-studio / shutterstock Dating in the modern age is hard enough without a global pandemic blocking all chances at finding true love.
You’re six weeks into your dry spell and have watched so many rom-coms that your concept of true romance is blurred. So, it’s no wonder you’ve found yourself replying to messages from guys you would never dream of talking to under ordinary circumstances.
But don’t let quarantine play tricks on you. You still have standards, and the men who slide into your DMs are far from ideal.
Mr. Right is out there quarantining alone until it’s safe for him to come find you. But with no chance to go out and meet your Prince Charming, you’re going to have to tread extra carefully to avoid being tricked by frogs.
If you’re single and looking to mingle (from a safe distance, of course), beware of these 6 types of guys you’re probably going to encounter but definitely want to avoid.
1. The Ghost
Ah, this old dating favorite. We’ve all heard of one, met one, and some of us have even been one.
Ghosts will be all paragraph texts and emojis one day, and leave you on "read" the next. If there’s one thing these types of guys need to learn in quarantine, it’s the value of communication and the importance of letting someone down easy.
The Ghost might be a guy you were talking to before social distancing was a thing. He was down for bar meet-ups and late-night drives before, but now that any kind of barrier has been put in his way, he's not here to wait around.
His loss, because you’re worth the wait and deserve someone who actually knows how to communicate.
Signs to watch out for:
- He never messages first.
- His replies are getting shorter and shorter.
- He’s always “too busy” to take your calls.
2. The Boomerang
The only thing worse than having someone completely ignore you, is the guys who do it over and over but still expect you to text back. These are what we could call Boomerangs: The guys who don’t reply to your message for days and then pick up the conversation as if it had never stopped.
You could almost say this is a reliable dating pattern if it wasn’t for the fact that Boomerangs are totally unreliable. These guys are likely to be someone who ghosted you in the past but is suddenly feeling inspired to reach out. And when I say suddenly, I mean so suddenly that they seem to forget they even texted you in the first place.
We’re all at home with nothing to do besides go on our phones, so these guys have absolutely no excuse. If he’s not texting you back, he’s not worth your time.
Signs to watch out for:
- He’s active on social media but not active in your texts.
- He doesn’t ask about you.
- He’s not into meaningful conversations.
3. The Long-Distance Boyfriend
Have you found yourself responding to a lot of persistent texts and talking for hours on the phone to a guy you’re not even dating? Yep, you’ve unintentionally got yourself a Long-Distance Boyfriend.
This can be a blessing if you’ve found a genuine connection that you can’t wait to pursue once this is all over. But if you were enjoying the single life and were only replying to him to be polite, this is bad news.
If you’re waking up to “good morning” texts, you need an exit strategy ASAP. Let him down gently, explain that you’re not looking for anything romantic, and you value him as a friend.
Signs to watch out for:
- He’s making post-quarantine plans with you.
- His family knows you guys are talking.
- He always texts first.
4. The Two-Timer
So, you’ve started texting this guy. He’s an old school friend or someone you met through work. It’s casual but it’s going well and you’re excited, so you tell a mutual friend only to find out that she’s texting him, too. Or, she knows someone who is. Or, she knows someone who knows someone who is.
Yikes! These are the guys who are using 4 different dating apps at any given moment and have a schedule of weekend hookups organized by Wednesday. And quarantine won’t stop his antics. The message you first received from him is probably copied and pasted from another girls' DMs.
Signs to watch out for:
- Lots of girls like and comment on his posts.
- He keeps saying he wants to keep things casual.
- He’s all about dirty texts with no real conversation.
5. The 'Come Over' Guy
Ever matched with a guy on a dating app only for him to invite you to his place after 2 messages and a GIF? Ever received a late-night “You up?” text every weekend for 3 months from a guy you hooked up with one time on a night out?
Wonder what those guys are doing now? The answer is: the exact same thing.
This guy has no respect for social distancing and doesn’t plan on letting a global pandemic stop him from getting laid. He’ll want to make out but call you a prude, even though you just have some respect for the health and safety of others.
Signs to watch out for:
- He doesn’t read the news.
- He’s still meeting up with “the boys.”
- He considers himself a "rulebreaker."
6. The Ex
Nothing like a global pandemic to make ghosts-of-boyfriends-past appear out of nowhere!
Quarantine has given him lots of time to think and he realizes he’s made a mistake. He also wants you to send hot pictures in that lingerie he loved and to somehow trust him again.
We all kind of love the thought of an ex desperately pining after us. But, let’s face it: if it took the world ending for him to value you, there’s nothing there to salvage.
Signs to watch out for:
- He’s always the first to like your posts.
- He’s started tagging you in memes that might have been funny while you were together (but totally aren’t now).
- He posts stories listening to your favorite artists.
Alice Kelly is a writer with a passion for lifestyle, entertainment, and trending topics.