Why You Hold On Too Long After A Break Up, By Zodiac Sign
Build that bridge and move on, sweetie!
No one likes to hear the words, “We need to talk.” One day you think everything is going well.
You wake up and are met with the end of your relationship as you knew it.
When you are on the receiving end of a big break up, it can be really jarring to just let go of everything you feel about the person, especially if the break up is unexpected.
According to developmental psychologist Deborah L. Davis, “When a relationship is over, feelings of rejection can numb your sense of self and wreck your balance.”
You feel disoriented like the rug has been completely pulled from underneath you. Naturally, your first reaction is to try and mend things, but Dr. Davis advises against it.
“For many jilted lovers, the first impulse is to try to fix what’s broken or recover what was lost,” she says. “But often, the beloved has moved on and reconciliation is not possible.”
It’s really easy to get lost in the forest during a breakup. Often, your friends can see everything clearly as an outsider looking in. They are offering you advice, day after day, but you aren’t ready to hear it.
Although it is a tough pill to swallow, listening to their advice is going to be beneficial for you in the end. Facing the emotions you are feeling will hurt your heart, but it will keep you away from larger problems.
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Dr. Davis says, “Repressing your grief can result in depression, anxiety, obsession, suppressed immune system, and chronic despair.” You are allowed to feel hurt. Lean on those who love and care for you.
One of the biggest questions a few weeks after a major break up is, “Why can’t I move on?” You have had enough time to process the initial shock of it all, but you just can’t get them out of your mind.
For some, it can be really easy to move on and move forward. For others, it can truly be an agonizing process. Looking at the stars at this time is one outlet for clarity.
Take a look at your zodiac sign and work with your dominating personality traits, strengths, and weaknesses to help yourself out and get back in the game!
ARIES (March 21 - April 19)
You are known for being courageous and confident, but when things don’t go your way, your impulsive urges can hold you back from seeing things in the grand scheme.
You may feel aggression creep into your life and become short-tempered with those around you. Your competitive nature is responsible for the reason you can’t let go of what used to be.
You can’t move on because you are worried about how others will perceive you now that you are single. But you are still you! Don’t worry about other people’s opinions and be unapologetically optimistic about the future.
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TAURUS (April 20 - May 20)
Your patience and loyalty make you a strong partner. You appreciate momentary pleasures, but deep down, you are in it for the long haul when it comes to romantic relationships.
You are a very sensual person who relies on tactile expressions of love. Most of all, you are a stubborn person. You can’t move on from your break up because you refuse to let things change from your routine. You know that it is best, but you would rather fight through something that isn’t working than uproot your daily regimen.
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GEMINI (May 21 - June 20)
You are a very gentle, yet passionate, romantic. You live a dual personality that is flared by different events in life. When things are going well, you are sociable, communicative, and expressive.
But when things don’t go your way, you become restless and unsure of yourself. You can’t let go of the relationship because you don’t have a solid grasp of what you want. Spend some time alone and dig deep into where you are in life before you make any harsh decisions. Be kind to yourself and do what is best for you.
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CANCER (June 21 - July 22)
You are a highly emotional and expressive person. Although you don’t have bad intentions with the way you outwardly express what you are feeling, it can become exhausting for those closest to you, if they are not equipped to handle it.
You’re sympathetic and intuitive, but you are also known for holding on to things much longer than need be. You are still hung up on your break up because you haven’t allowed yourself to process all of your emotions.
You’ve bottled everything up in an attempt to not seem too needy. But listen to Dr. Davis! You need to let yourself feel it out.
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LEO (July 23 - August 22)
You are a fearless leader whose confidence is desired by everyone around you. You love to have a great time; you’re always the life of the party! You are very dominating, and although that is nothing to be ashamed of, it can be a huge turn off for some people.
Relationships with Leos often go south because of combative personalities. You are clinging to the relationship because you refuse to be ignored and denied what you want.
But you have to conceptualize that what is best for you isn’t always best for others. Practice compassion and empathy during the healing process of this breakup and you will be a stronger lover in the end!
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VIRGO (August 23 - September 22)
You are incredibly analytical and methodological when it comes to all aspects of life. You appreciate order and reasoning in your life and thrive with an organized mindset. You are incredibly loyal in a relationship, but can find yourself being walked over or taken advantage of.
You are still stuck on your ex because you are way too in your head trying to make sense of it all. Often, breakups aren’t justified.
People aren’t always truthful about why things didn’t work out, and that is incredibly frustrating for you. Learn to let go of the things you can’t control and you are likely to live a happier and more fulfilling romantic life.
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LIBRA (September 23 - October 22)
You are known for being fair, diplomatic, and justified in all of your actions. You like to think things through before you act on them in order to maintain the peace between you and the world around you. Although you are very confident and secure in yourself, you hate being alone.
Spending too much time with yourself can cause you to completely flip sides on yourself. You are dependent on others, which is why you can’t get over your break up. It’s great to share a life with someone, but a romantic partner isn’t the only kind of person you can surround yourself with.
Take this time of being single to reconnect and rebuild your friendships. Let people into your life that will stick with you through the good and the bad.
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SCORPIO (October 23 - November 21)
Your personality is very bold, brave, and stubborn. You are determined on what you want and will do anything to get it. You are very dedicated and persistent to the causes you care for.
You are a natural-born leader who dedicated themselves to being there for others. However, your confidence can sometimes manifest as a facade for deeper insecurities. This leads you to be a dominantly jealous ex. And for that reason, you cannot let go of the past.
You are jealous of your past relationship's stability and ease. You long for the steady routine of what used to be, but you are at a transitional point in your life. Take it by the horns and take a new direction in life.
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SAGITTARIUS (November 22 - December 21)
You are the most outgoing and enthusiastic of the zodiac signs. You are always open to adventure and will stop at nothing to achieve your personal goals. You are a restless soul that prefers a wandering road to a steady routine.
You are too curious to stick to one thing for too long! However, this makes you very impatient. You try your hardest to be a people pleaser, which is why this break up is still hurting your heart. Let go of the need to fix things between everyone in your life.
You won’t be able to change the minds of those who have already made them up. Focus your energy on the things you can change and make positive and healthy choices for your future.
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CAPRICORN (December 22 - January 19)
You are a family-oriented person that heavily relies on tradition and consistency. It’s about more than the motions with you; you’re connected to the sentimental value of things more than the physicality of it all.
You are very disciplined and practice good manners wherever you go. You are practical and responsible, which makes you a reliable and stand-up friend! Sometimes, your personality can come off as arrogant and condescending. Which is frustrating!
You can’t move on until you clearly and accurately convey the way you are feeling to your ex, and when you are in a highly emotional state, that won’t come easy for you. Take a deep breath and channel your innate practicality.
Eventually, your head will clear, your thoughts will become organized, and you can move forward with a clear conscience.
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AQUARIUS (January 20 - February 18)
You are the most intellectual of the signs. You are constantly questioning authority and commit yourself to solve the problems of the world. You are very progressive and independent in your thinking.
You prefer your alone time, but don’t mind sharing your space with people you care deeply about. Being so in your head can make you temperamental and uncompromising in a relationship.
Although you like to share your academic thoughts, you aren’t as open with your emotional side. You are still invested in the relationship because there is so much you never got the chance to say.
Unfortunately, there isn’t too much that can be done to fix that in regards to your most recent breakup, but you can apply this to future ones! Allow yourself to be vulnerable with people you trust and you will never feel like things went unsaid.
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PISCES (February 19 - March 20)
You are the social butterfly of the signs. You are very compassionate and connected to others, which makes you a great caregiver. You are successful in the emotional connections of relationships and can fall a bit short on the physical side.
Which makes you feel insecure and fearful of new ventures. You are holding on for too long to this break up because you are trying desperately to still make it work. You find yourself being overly trusting of people who make you feel comfortable and it ends with you being hurt.
Find the balance of letting people in while also protecting your own heart.
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Madison Kerth is a writer who covers astrology, pop culture and relationship topics.