6 Things That Happen When You Bring Up The Bible (Or Religion) On A First Date
Religion and politics are the two most heated topics a potential couple could ever have.
No one wants to offend anyone but there are some topics that are off limits for a reason.
Religion, money, politics, are all touchy subjects. No one wants to be asked on a first date how much they make at job or who they voted for.
And, if you didn't meet at church, on a spiritual retreat or as a missionary volunteer or political event for a particular candidate, you won't necessarily know if your beliefs are the same.
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Unless you ask someone how they feel about the Bible, God or going to church/temple/mosque, you won't know.
Something people just want to know sooner than later rather than investing energy and finding out that they fell in love with someone that they don't want to marry.
It's much harder to move on when you're heart is involved. Talking about religion on a first date makes this avoidable.
People are hot and cold when it comes to religion. Beliefs and world view matter in love, because ultimately you have to either respect the differences or decide you can't and move on.
Whould you talk about religion on a first date? At first glance, it may seem like an obvious answer. No.
Why not? Because religion and the Bible are divisive subjects that will only lead to tension and the date will probably last 10 seconds if you both have beliefs that clash and you see no reason to continue on.
However, lots of people of faith consider their view of god as important. Especially when religion is declining in America, and knowing a person's spiritual practices aren't always clear.
Even though you may think you are dating someone who has no faith system at all, the numbers are encouraging.
About 80% of Millennials believe that there is a god out there so if you are a Christian who MUST date someone who is a born-again or a Catholic who wants their marriage to be a sacrement and performed in church, asking is the only way to know.
On a social level, all religious dating dealbreakers aside, it's easier to love a person who is similar to you, and also much nicer to date.
Like it or not religion plays a huge role in whether that relationship can work, and the pros and cons are pretty much standard no matter what spiritual side of the fence you are on.
Here are 6 things that can happen if you choose to bring up religion on a first date.
1. You may hear something you don’t want know.
Generally speaking, if you find someone with differing viewpoints he/she may say something you may not like. Either they may say that “God’s not real” or “I fully believe everything in the Bible”.
Wherever you may fall it’s important to never take anything personally.
We seem to psychologically get attached to a lot of our ideas and see that if someone attacks those ideas that they are attacking us as a person.
In short, have a thick skin.
2. The date could turn to crap.
If differing religion is a deal breaker there’s no point in continuing the date. Most people feel awkward saying how they feel and just leaving, most prefer to stay and wait for the date to be done. It’s important not to be too picky but also not too flexible with your values. If something is a deal breaker then it’s a deal breaker.
3. You may see the relationship as a waste of time.
Let’s get one thing straight, you aren't going to marry most of the guys/girls you go on dates with. If you feel that you are wasting your time and money then you should just be honest with the person and cut the date there.
4. They may have similar views to you.
Although we love to gloss overlooks all the time, values do matter. As much as a guy/girl is fun to look at if they’re about as bland as a plank of wood you won’t want to continue dating them. The same can be said when you’re talking religion. If someone shares the same faith as you that can be a positive discussion point.
5. If you do have similar views you guys are more likely to get a second date
If you guys have similar views you can go to church/mosque/temple with each other. Faith can be a connector of people. Having similar faiths can also mean you’re less likely to have issues talking to each other's families.
For some families, it’s important that people find a partner with a similar religion, so filtering out people who don’t share that will lead to less pain in the future.
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6. If you do have similar views you are more likely to get married
When you have a shared religious belief then you are more likely to get married and be stable. It isn’t to say there are times that won’t be rough but ultimately having a similar faith can lead you not only to a closer relationship with your god but potentially your future husband/wife.
Steven Hall is a writer who covers astrology, pop culture and relationship topics.