14 Subtle Signs You're Nowhere Near Ready To Be In A Relationship
There's nothing wrong with being single for a little longer.
Alina Rosanova | Shutterstock When people first begin looking for a serious relationship, they are excited but nervous to begin a new chapter in their lives. Sadly, finding real love isn't so easy.
Sometimes, putting yourself out there ends in heartbreak, and may have you convinced that love isn't for you. While it's not necessarily true, there are certain indicators that you should probably be single right now.
Here are 14 subtle signs a person is nowhere near ready to be in a relationship
1. You're annoyed by every little thing people do
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You go out and find yourself irritated by anyone standing within a few feet of you. You have an attitude when strangers talk to you. You're horrible at taking compliments from strangers and you basically never initiate human interaction.
With friends, things aren't much better. It seems as though you're a bit jaded from the pressure to settle down with the perfect person, and you're letting it build into resentment.
2. You're settling
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You know it, your friends and family know it, but you keep convincing yourself that things will turn out differently than your last relationship.
The way you see it, being with the wrong person is better than not being with anyone at all. But that way of thinking enables you to look right past red flags, all for the sake of finding someone, anyone.
3. You don't know how to compromise
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Everything is all about you. In a relationship, you care about your partner, just not as much as you care about your own wants and needs.
You don't see compromise as a healthy alternative to not getting your way, and you have no problem throwing a temper tantrum to make sure that you do. This is not only a sign that you're not ready for a relationship, it also indicates very low maturity on your end.
4. You're self-centered
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They say it's hard to have someone else love you when you can't even love yourself, but there are levels to this. A little modesty never hurt anybody, especially if you want to spend your life with someone.
You're missing out on a potential soulmate because you're too busy looking at yourself.
5. You're impatient
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From getting somewhere on time to setting long-term goals, your patience is really thin. You want things to happen exactly when you say they should.
You don't see where a partner is working to get to the big picture; instead, you can only focus on where they are now. While some wouldn't see this as a sign of not being ready for a relationship, slow and steady wins the race in this case.
6. You don't want to make sacrifices for your partner's benefit
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If you're self-centered and impatient, it's not likely that you're willing to make sacrifices that benefit both you and your partner. But this simply won't keep a relationship afloat.
A working, lasting relationship takes sacrifices from both parties involved. And if that's not something you're willing to do, it's best to not enter into a romantic partnership.
7. You don't accept the concept of baggage
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Even though everyone has baggage, including yourself, you can't seem to grasp the reality of it. You don't quite understand that a potential partner had a past before they met you, and may be holding on to regret or anger.
You don't want to accept that no one is perfect, and you're constantly nagging and complaining about the baggage that you knew they came with in the first place. It's a glaring but subtle sign that you should probably remain single.
8. You're still in love with your ex
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There's no way you're ready for a new relationship if you're still hung up on a past ex. How are you going to move on when your heart belongs to someone else?
Take time to heal. You owe it to yourself, and a future partner, and you will surely thank yourself later.
9. You still have a lot of work to do on yourself
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Before you can be in a healthy relationship, you must love yourself. But if you don't feel that way, take a step back and use that time to truly reflect.
Realize that you don't want love, you just want to love yourself. You want to get closer to your goals. You just want to get your act together, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that.
10. You have major trust issues
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If you can't trust, you can't be in a relationship. It's as simple as that. Healthy, lasting relationships are built on trust, so without it, you may as well be single.
11. You don't love yourself
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There are other indicators that you're nowhere near ready for a relationship, and it all comes back to how you perceive yourself.
You only see your value when someone else points it out to you. You struggle with self-identity and even more with self-love. And if you can't love yourself, you can't expect someone else to without conditions.
12. You hold your ex's past against any potential partner
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You go into every relationship expecting your new partner to make the same mistakes your old partner made. You readily accuse them of doing the same things, even when it's very clear they haven't.
You're not ready to let the hurt go, which means you're not ready to move on. And if you're not ready to move on, a relationship is out of the question.
13. You can't reciprocate the things you're asking for
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You want trust, loyalty, forgiveness, and more, but you can't dish it out in return. You want intimacy, support, and cooked meals, but you can't provide any of that either.
A good relationship is all about give and take. If you can't reciprocate all the things you want for yourself, you're not ready for a relationship, and it's clear as can be.
14. You want to be single
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If you're out there in the world living your best life, and feel like you don't need a partner to have a great time, you don't need to force yourself to have one!
Be with your friends, living your authentic life. It's more than enough love for you at this time.
Isis Nezbeth is a freelance writer, author, and editor-in-chief of The Goddess Column. Her work has also been featured on Bolde, Diply, Thought Catalog, and others.