Zodiac Signs That Like Taking Control During Sex, Ranked From Least To Most
Does your zodiac sign like to be in charge, or do you let someone else call the shots?
When it comes to sex, some people are more comfortable being in control of the action while others prefer laying back and enjoy the sensations. Whether you’re into bondage, S&M, or the simpler, more vanilla activities, most people naturally fall into one category or the other.
Bear in mind, though, that sexuality is complicated, and the roles we play in the bedroom aren’t always obvious. The person who’s actually in control isn’t necessarily the one giving orders or holding their partner down.
Often, the “submissive” is actually calling the shots — maybe they get off on the attention, or they just want to relax and let someone else take responsibility for what happens. Their dominating partner knows this and does their best to serve their specific needs.
Of course, everyone’s moods and preferences change from day to day, so the daily horoscope can tell you a lot about what your partner might want in the moment. But in general, a detailed natal chart will show whether someone’s a control freak, a happy submissive, an equal partner, or a detached observer when it comes to sex.
Look at the positions of their natal Mars and Venus. Mars is the planet of passionate action and tends to be in control, while Venus is the more passive, gentle side of love. On the other hand, if they have strong Libra influences, they might prefer an equal balance of power when it comes to sex.
Look at the sign and planets in their eighth house, too: this segment of the chart rules sexuality and those mysterious forces of the cosmos that compel us to satiate our deepest desires. (Scorpio, the sign that we all associate with sexuality, is the default ruler of this house—go figure.)
Here’s where each zodiac sign falls when it comes to taking control in the bedroom.
1. LIBRA (September 23 - October 22)
As mentioned above, Libra prefers equality for all participants in almost every situation. If their partner enjoys taking or relinquishing control, Libra is happy to accommodate, but they’re probably going to want to take turns so that everyone gets to experience both roles. A truly dominant or submissive Libra is rare.
2. PISCES (February 19 - March 20)
Emotional and passive, Pisces is uncomfortable when they’re given too much control over someone else. They’d spend the whole time worrying if they’re going too far (or not far enough).
As empaths, Pisces can always tell what’s in your heart, but that doesn’t necessarily extend to the physical side of love. If you want your Pisces to grab the reins, you’ll have to tell them exactly how you like it.
3. VIRGO (August 23 - September 22)
Virgo loves to learn by experience, so they’re usually up for trying new techniques and sexy games. In general, though, this sign tends to be passive and neurotic, so unless they’re very familiar with their partner’s needs, they’re likely to let someone else call the shots.
4. CANCER (June 21 - July 22)
Cancer is another normally passive sign, but they do have a possessive streak — when they trust someone well enough to let them into their bedroom, Cancer likes to know that their partner isn’t about to go anywhere.
Cancer doesn’t mind letting someone else think they’re in charge, but in their own subtle, subconscious way, they do tend to be the bossiest submissives of the zodiac.
5. GEMINI (May 21 - June 20)
Gemini is an expert at making everyone feel comfortable. They might not be tuned into the emotional side of sex, but as the sign of communication, they’re very good at reading others and finding ways to accommodate.
However, Gemini has a way of making others want to please them, so even when they seem to be giving up control, they’ll usually end up getting things their own way anyway.
6. LEO (July 23 - August 22)
You’d think that, with Leo’s enormous ego, they’d insist on being in control at all times, but that’s not necessarily the case. Leo demands their partner’s full attention, of course, but they live for praise — they tend to be very considerate lovers, willing to do whatever it takes to please their partner.
Dominant, submissive, or otherwise, any kind of attention is fine with Leo, as long as they get to hear about how good they are!
7. SAGITTARIUS (November 22 - December 21)
Sagittarius doesn’t care too much about being in charge, but by the same token, they sure don’t want anyone else bossing them around, either. Their natural curiosity and enthusiasm for new thrills often gets the better of them.
Once they’ve got an idea in their head, getting them to change course is like trying to stop a freight train. If you don’t like what Sagittarius has planned, your best bet is to distract them with something even better.
8. AQUARIUS (January 20 - February 18)
Aquarius is another freedom-loving sign, so the whole dominant-submissive scene might not appeal to them, though they’ll play along if it pleases their partner or gets them something else that they want.
Aquarius often enjoys pushing people’s buttons, though, and when they start messing with their partner’s mind (even if they’re just playing), they can come off as controlling.
9. CAPRICORN (December 22 - January 19)
Capricorn has an agenda. They’ve spent a lot of time thinking about what they want during sex and how they’re going to go about getting it.
Your Capricorn partner has a plan, but before you accuse them of being too controlling, give it a chance: it’s likely that they’ve taken your own special desires into consideration too, and it could be one of the best experiences you’ve ever had.
10. TAURUS (April 20 - May 20)
With a rush of libido, Taurus’ stubborn possessiveness really comes into play. It might not go as far as master-and-slave role-playing, but Taurus sees their partner as a valuable treasure.
One of the most sensual signs, they will eagerly protect you and please you, as long as you’re okay with the idea that you “belong” to them.
11. ARIES (March 21 - April 19)
Aries is ruled by Mars. When it comes to sex, this planet’s aggressively passionate nature easily translates into a control fetish.
Aries probably doesn’t have any interest in or patience for playing a lot of games, though — they like everything to be clear and upfront, and would rather just go straight to the main event. The sooner they get to scratch their itch, the better.
12. SCORPIO (October 23 - November 21)
No surprise here! When it comes to sexuality and physical desire, Scorpio is right in their element. No matter which partner is calling the shots or what kind of fetish is being explored, you can bet that Scorpio is in control—even if they’re the ones tied up.
Trudi Mentior grew up in Great Falls, Montana, where she spent her formative years wondering just what might be beyond those vast plains, on the other side of those distant mountains. She now lives in Vancouver, Washington, with her husband, three cats, and a loudmouthed hyacinth macaw (who loves to scare the cats).