What To Never Say To A Man, Based On His Zodiac Sign
Because some things can never be unsaid.
weheartit Is it okay to say whatever you want to your romantic partner or should you consider the impact your words may have if you say them?
One of the foundations of a good relationship is great communication. However, having great communication doesn't mean saying whatever pops into your head. There needs to be some filters in place, and there are some things you don’t want to say to your boyfriend.
Think about it. We all have certain buttons that when pressed can set us off. Astrology and even our horoscope are usually great indicators of the things that bug us most. They may be perfectly innocuous things that wouldn't bother anyone else, but for you, they tend to set off an immediate reaction.
I can’t stand it when someone tells me to lower my voice, especially if it’s not somewhere where quiet is the mandate. It feels controlling and shaming, and if you want me to explode, that’s what you say to me. For other people, telling them to be quiet or shut up may not bother them at all. It’s just a personal thing.
The experiences we have when we’re growing up can shape how we react to things that people do or say. And sometimes what they don’t do or say can get an even stronger reaction.
Communication can be tricky. There are so many things that go into communication — body language, vocal tone, and even the words we use. You and your significant other may speak the same language, but there are probably words that mean different things to both of you. And what if the language you communicate in is a second language for you? You may have a completely different understanding of a word than your partner.
Most of the time, we don’t want to be deliberately hurtful to our partners, so we know not to insult them or hurt their feelings. But there are times when we have no clue that something we say is hurtful or unkind.
In that same respect, here's what not to say to your man, all based on his zodiac sign.
ARIES (March 21 - April 19)
Don't say to your Aries boyfriend, "You're not a man, you're an immature boy." While Aries can sometimes be impulsive and irresponsible, they don't like to be thought of as a manchild. Saying that he's not a man will shatter his ego and it may take a lot of work on your part to make him feel whole again.
You never want him to feel as if his maturity is threatened; you don't know what he might do to foolishly prove that he's as manly as it gets.
TAURUS (April 20 - May 20)
Never say to your Taurus boyfriend, "You need to man up." This is negative reinforcement and emasculating. Taurus wants you to build him up, not cut him down. You can be sure if he feels like the situation calls for overt masculinity, he'll use it; otherwise, he's going to think of a more cerebral solution.
GEMINI (May 21 - June 20)
Never say to your Gemini boyfriend, "Why not leave the comedy to the professionals? You're not funny, just embarrassing." Telling anyone they're not funny is problematic, but telling a Gemini, who prides themselves on their smarts and their ability to see the humor in almost any situation, is almost as bad as punching them in the face.
If you don't think he's funny, it may be better to exit the relationship rather than telling him that he's not funny.
CANCER (June 21 - July 22)
You don't want to tell your Cancer partner, "If you loved me, you'd know." As caring, empathic, and compassionate as Cancer is, they still can't read your mind. Don't expect them to just know what you need or want.
You need to be direct with them and avoid as many misconceptions and misunderstandings as you can. If you question their love for you, it will hurt them deeply.
LEO (July 23 - August 22)
Never tell your Leo boyfriend, "I don't like your friends. I think you should stop hanging out with them." Leos are very social creatures and they need their group of friends around them all the time.
First, if you say you don't like his friends, you're criticizing his judgment. Plus, they've probably been in his life longer than you have. Don't make him choose; you may not like his choice.
VIRGO (August 23 - September 22)
Don't tell your Virgo boyfriend, "I've trained you well." This will not only annoy him when you say it, it will continue to bother him for a long time. Virgos pride themselves on their big brains and how they know how to do almost everything.
When you say something like you trained him, you're taking away his power and giving it to yourself, and that doesn't fly with Virgo. When you say stuff like that, it eats away at both him and his ego.
LIBRA (September 23 - October 22)
Don't say to your Libra partner, "You need to get back to the gym — it looks like you've gained some weight" or, "Hey, look at all that grey, Grandpa." You wouldn't want him to insult you or give you some constructive criticism, so why would you assume it would be okay to insult him, even if it was for his own good?
If you're truly concerned, think up a more positive and supportive way to do it. Maybe invite him to go with you to the gym or start making healthier meals rather than having pizza every night.
SCORPIO (October 23 - November 21)
Don't tell your Scorpio partner, "I promised not to tell anyone but I'm sure it's okay if I tell you." Scorpios take truthfulness very seriously and if you're willing to break a confidence with him, what's to say you wouldn't tell someone else something he asked you to keep secret?
Once you say something like this, he'll start to have trouble trusting you and it will get increasingly difficult to get him to open up to you.
SAGITTARIUS (November 22 - December 21)
Never say to your Sagittarius boyfriend, "We have to talk." This phrase almost always comes off as ominous and when he hears it, he's slowly going to start to panic. The last thing he wants is a big confrontation or to hear about his failings.
It's okay if you have things you want to discuss with a Sagittarius, just don't say it in that way for it may make him close up or maybe even ghost you. The best thing is just to have a talk without any preamble.
CAPRICORN (December 22 - January 19)
Don't say to your Capricorn partner, "Is it okay we don't spend the holidays with your family? I can't stand being around them." Capricorns take family very seriously, and even if they spend all day and night complaining about their family, it doesn't give you license to imply that you don't like them.
No matter how into you your Capricorn partner is, never assume that they'll put you first over their family because that's probably not the case.
AQUARIUS (January 20 - February 18)
Never ever say to your Aquarius partner, "That's a stupid idea and it will never work." Aquarians are very creative and innovative, and they want their partners to support them and be their number one fan. If you diss their project, he'll feel as if you don't believe in him and he won't believe in the two of you as a couple.
Besides, you have no idea where that stupid idea could lead. Some of the greatest inventions of all time came from completely ridiculous and stupid ideas. Telling him his idea is stupid makes you look small-minded.
PISCES (February 19 - March 20)
Don't say to a Pisces boyfriend, "Your friend is hot." This will just set him on a path of doubt and insecurity. Do you think his friend is irresistible? Will you cheat on Pisces, or maybe you're already cheating on him?
You know you would not be happy if he said that your friend was hot, so why would you think saying it to him would be okay? If you're trying to make him jealous, it may work but it could also destroy your relationship.
Christine Schoenwald is a writer, performer, and teacher who loves writing and performing personal narratives. She's had pieces in The Los Angeles Times, Salon, Woman's Day, Purple Clover, Bustle, and is a regular contributor to Ravishly and YourTango. Check out her website or her Facebook page.