What Your Sex Style Reveals About Your Personality
Your bedroom style reveals more about you than you want it to.
How you love, live and seduce in the bedroom says a lot about your personality. The bedroom is a place of play, intimacy, and secrecy in many aspects for your average adult. Even though many of us have many different facets and aspects to our personality, the bedroom can reveal sides of ourselves that no one else has seen before, other than our partners.
So what really can your bedroom style say about your sex personality? More than you would care to admit.
1. Dominant Style
A person who is domineering in bed is behaving as such for two reasons: lacking power in his or her real life, or craves power in all aspects of his or her world.
For the person craving power, he or she may be having issues at work or be unemployed. He or she might be under financial stress or having to make personal sacrifices that he or she doesn't want to do. Perhaps it's a woman who spent years with a controlling and abusive man and she now wants to reclaim power. Perhaps it's a man who was cheated on and emasculated by a former wife or partner. Gaining his mojo back requires a little power in-between the sheets.
The bedroom is then a place to earn back some pride and power in a life of feeling powerless. Sex and the bedroom are separate domains to "get it back" and feel confident again. It can make an underdog a hero again, at least in the bedroom sense of "hero."
Then, of course, there's the dominant partner who's simply dominant because, as a person, he or she is a bit selfish. A dominant partner might have no interest in letting another partner's needs lead the way, showing that the dominant person thinks of him or herself first. Sure, selfishness is not the most attractive trait, but at the same time, a dominant person also is great at getting what they want in life.
A dominant partner may also be a great leader and have the ability to bring out the most hidden longings and abilities in someone. A dominant partner could make some feel safe or excited enough to let down and show who he or she really is.
A dominant person could be the kind of person who can see into someone's soul and heart and know what he or she needs. A dominant partner might be the person you see making everyone laugh at the office party or coaxing shy friends to open up and join everyone for a round of karaoke.
2. Passive Style
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The passive lovemaker could be showing a side of him or herself that loves to be spoiled and attended to, craving being the focus of attention. The passive lovemaker could also be so afraid and inhibited that he or she needs another partner — perhaps the domineering one — to bring it out of him or her.
The passive lovemaker might be the person you know who tries very little to succeed in life and skates by with what he or she knows. The passive lovemaker might be lazy in bed because he or she believes you deserve to please him or her, and that you know what's best for the passive lovemaker's body.
A passive lovemaker might not be an amazing leader but somehow, he or she gets what is needed and wanted, without having to put up much of a fuss. You might find that your passive lover is reserved in speech and quiet. Afraid to make a choice or worried about disrupting others, a passive lovemaker is the kind of person who feels as if it's best for the other person to dictate the lovemaking and he or she will just take what is offered.
Speaking up is too either frightening or requires too much effort, so instead, the passive lovemaker rolls with the dice and does the same in life. They can be very easy going and private, keeping real thoughts and feelings to him or herself.
3. Showboat Style
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The showboat style lover is the one who is all bells and whistles — sex toys, lingerie and role play. There is no contraption or set-up the showboat lover won't try. The showboat lover tends to be either in dire need of attention, or a creative type that can't do "boring sex." The showboat lover needs a creative outlet and there isn't anything in his or her life that can't be added on or made into a show.
Typically, this lover will be incredibly detail-oriented and doting but also expect that this lover might be aggressive and tend to want to run the bedroom. If you like being in charge, you'll butt heads with this type of lover.
Your showboat style lover will often need intense sex and frequently because in many ways the showboat lover is incredibly intelligent but also easily bored. The intensity stems from either a personality built on passion or a lot of colorful life experience.
Don't be surprised if there are some skeletons or secrets in this lover's closet, some of which he or she won't want to talk about. Earning this person's trust takes time even if he or she is willing to pull out all the stops to get you off.
4. Hopeless Romantic Style
The hopeless romantic will stray away from anything remotely filthy or kinky, and stick strictly to the fairy tale in his or her head. This type of lover is often the person that is eager to please and wanting to keep the peace.
Sometimes, the hopeless romantic is secretly feeling less than, and so all the flowery silkiness of his or her sex is an attempt to make this person feel special and wanted. That might mean that you're not making your partner feel special or that this person's self-esteem needs some work.
The hopeless romantic will give you hours of massage and carefully to attend to your every sexual need, so long as it's not crass. You're not going to get a lot of experimentation with this type of partner. It could take years to get this person to try an even slightly unflattering or kinky pose.
This same person is hesitant to make changes or take risks in life. Pulling in the steady 9 to 5 is just perfect for the hopeless romantic, so long as he or she has a healthy fantasy outlet whether it is a love of books, guilty pleasure TV-watching, or a fitness routine.