You Only Live Once — Go Ahead And Be A BADASS

Far too often we're scared. Driven out of fear, we keep our dreams quiet and let other bullshit that doesn't mean a whole lot take up the most room in our lives. 

We hold on to our own screwed up self esteem and put everybody else's considerations before our own. The idea of "living every day as your last," just means we can party more. We hardly ever spend time going after what we really want. 

There's a routine to life that we don't realize we're in. The pattern is probably a little different for everyone, but for me it goes something like "boyfriend, breakup, boyfriend, breakup, boyfriend, breakup."

My relationships have literally been back-to-back almost my entire life. It's my routine, and I need to break it before I lose myself completely. 

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Now I don't want to get too spiritual on you, but personally I believe we all have little missions in life and lessons we're supposed to learn. The funny thing about a lesson is, if you refuse to learn it, it's just going to keep coming back. 

The idea of being a badass is one that probably appeals to everyone. And while in my head it looks like a tough girl wearing a leather jacket and riding a motorcycle, it's really a lot simpler. 

A badass is just a woman who's living for herself. She's learning her lessons, she's not being too hard on herself when she falls of course, but most importantly, she always get back on track. 

Loving yourself is so much more than body image and spa days. It's about being your own advocate and not taking any shit. It's being understanding when it comes to your own insecurities and tough when people try to drag you down into theirs. It's about taking the wheel on your own life and never letting anyone else drive. 

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This all sounds awesome in theory, but when put to the test, it can be difficult to do. We're just humans, and sometimes our short term emotional needs can outweigh our long term goals. Being a badass doesn't mean you don't cry.

It means you allow yourself a good cry because you know you need it, but you don't let it go past anything but that. 

So while you might be unsure about how to break your own vicious cycle and take the life that's rightfully yours, know that the first step will probably be a step back. And that's okay. 

If your old pattern was boyfriend after boyfriend like me, than let's make the new one, trying and failing over and over again.

Because each little victory will bring you closer and closer to the person you're supposed to be.

You just have to start fighting first.