The Terrible Reason A Woman Used A Ham Sandwich To Describe Taylor Swift's Vagina

No matter how great your mother is, she probably did something to embarrass you. But even so, you're better off than the children of  Jennifer Mayers who used a ham sandwich to illustrate the difference in her daughter's virginal vagina and Taylor Swift's vagina.

Oh, and it doesn't stop there. Mrs. Mayers is constantly tweeting the most offensive things you've ever read and that's the point. She isn't just saying what's on her mind, she's trying to get a reaction.

It's one thing to compare vaginas to ham sandwiches, and it's another to be a completely racist, sexist, homophobic, white supremacist, and hater-of-almost-everybody, which Jennifer Mayers appears to be, but that's because she's been carefully created. 

Jennifer Mayers' tweets were so horrible that people started to question if she was indeed a real person. And it turns out that Ms. Mayers is a fake and her words are satire.  

Here's the thing with dry humor: it's not always easy for people to recognize it, and the question becomes if no one takes something as humorous, does it lose its humor? Betty Bowers, America's Best Christian is a satirical character that does a better job at getting her message across than the Jennifer Mayer's character.

Mayers' ham sandwich tweet went viral, even though it made no sense whatsoever. It was outrageous but ultimately confusing.

Photo: Twitter

This whole thing is wrong, wrong, wrong. You don't compare any part of the female anatomy to a dock worker's lunch, especially not your daughters. And hello! The vagina is internal, so the ham slices must be the labia. But it's so crazy that you can't take it seriously. See what I mean about dry humor? It sometimes takes a lot to get the joke.

If you're going to use it to make a point about someone having a lot of sex, it doesn't make any sense. Your labia doesn't get pulled and flattened over time. And since when did Taylor Swift become the representative of all things promiscuous and slutty? You can reason that this is so outlandish, it has to be satire.

Photo: Twitter

Obviously, she's not a real person.

It really annoys me when people speak for me or call me a fake. Are you in my home? Are you tweeting for me? No. I am very real so calm it

— Jennifer Mayers (@southern_mayers) July 7, 2016

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According to the internet, Jennifer Mayers is a 44-year-old housewife of Guatemalan descent who lives in Baton Rouge, Louisiana and enjoys being a racist, sexist, white supremacist, and tweeting and blogging her hate-fueled offensive opinions. Oh, and she's a Trump supporter. Which makes complete sense.

It's challenging to choose the worst of her tweets; they're not only offensive, but they're mean and can take away any hope you have for the human heart and civilization as a whole. Mayers can make you question the idea of free speech, which is what whoever is behind this site is trying to do.

When someone says something so out there, you notice it, it makes you think, and hopefully, it makes you react.

The role of a woman is to serve and obey. Hillary Clinton is trying to ensure the end of this Earth. She is a follower of Satan #Trump2016 — Jennifer Mayers (@southern_mayers) June 7, 2016

Hillary Clinton should be in the kitchen or making love to her husband WHERE SHE BELONGS! Evil woman! #CAPrimary #Trump2016 #cnnelection — Jennifer Mayers (@southern_mayers) June 8, 2016

Part of the reason I gave birth to my daughter at home in an inflatable pool is so that homosexuals at the hospital had no access to us. — Jennifer Mayers (@southern_mayers) June 13, 2016  

#Happy4th to the true and dedicated (white) Americans who work for a living and contribute to society. I'm comforted today. We are superior — Jennifer Mayers (@southern_mayers) July 4, 2016

What a loving girlfriend to let him die right beside her. I almost expected her to light a cigarette and prop her feet up. #PhilandoCastile — Jennifer Mayers (@southern_mayers) July 7, 2016

Gee all I have to do is be black and get shot and complete strangers will give me hundreds of thousands of dollars? #AltonSterling Garbage. — Jennifer Mayers (@southern_mayers) July 7, 2016  

Crucified daily. Verbally raped and assaulted. A martyr for my beliefs upon the cross of modern media. I am a new Christ incarnation amen — Jennifer Mayers (@southern_mayers) July 10, 2016

I love how the British people with their bad hygiene are judging ME all of a sudden. We fled your slavery! — Jennifer Mayers (@southern_mayers) July 11, 2016

Black dogs are the most commonly euthanized ones and least adopted at shelters. Ponder that while you cash out your EBT cards. #science — Jennifer Mayers (@southern_mayers) July 5, 2016

Elizabeth Warren is a homosexual who thinks that by slandering President Trump that America will not see her depravity. I SEE YOU LESBIAN! — Jennifer Mayers (@southern_mayers) June 27, 2016

Not only are they both morbidly obese but he is obviously a homosexual and ruining this fat girl's life. #SINNER https://t.co/oHesnGNraF — Jennifer Mayers (@southern_mayers) June 26, 2016

#BrockTurner is not a rapist. Maybe we should teach our daughters to drink responsibly and to never lie. He's being made into a scapegoat. — Jennifer Mayers (@southern_mayers) June 21, 2016

#NoWomanEver with bad skin should serve a family and expect a tip — Jennifer Mayers (@southern_mayers) June 18, 2016

Mayers' outrageous tweets just go on and on and get worse. When she's not calling Christy Sheats (the woman who shoot and killed her two daughters) a martyr, she's describing Alton Sterling as an entitled black thug. If Mayers' tweets weren't bad enough, she does full posts on her blog (and apparent book), An Elegant Life, with titles such as "Taylor Swift: Role Model or Prostitute?" and "Rape in America."

No one in their right mind would say some of the things she says with a straight face. But is she going way too far for it to be funny, and will it ever be the right time to joke about some of these topics?

Mayers tweets and blog posts continue to receive attention. The problem is that there are people who don't know that this is a humor site and are taking her hateful tweets as truth.

Humor can often be mean-spirited and cruel, and when it is, it ceases to be funny anymore.

If you're going to do a satirical site, please let people in on the joke or some haters are just going to take these horrific tweets at face value and use them to feed their racist, homophobic, sexist agendas.