7 Reasons Dolly Parton And Her Boobs Should Be President
I'm with HER (and her boobs).
In an interview with the New York Times prior to the election, Dolly talked about the presidential candidates. Regarding Hillary, Dolly said "If she gets it, I'll certainly be behind her."
Folks took this quote and ran with it, saying that Dolly had endorsed Clinton. But Dolly was quick to point out that she had endorsed NO ONE. In her statement she also joked, saying:
"I try not to get political but if I am, I might as well just run myself 'cause I've got the hair for it, it's huge, and they could always use more boobs in the race."
It was just a joke made to diffuse a tough situation for La Parton. But it got me thinking: would Dolly Parton and her boobs serving as president really be such a crazy idea?
Maybe not. Here's some evidence I dug up to prove she's more than worthy of the office.
1. She's all about positivity
We might look at something like solving the national debt and go, "I can't do it!" But Dolly thinks otherwise.
2. She's pro-woman
Today we as women have to fight for things like tax-free tampons. With Dolly as president, the cost of makeup and hair would be covered by the government as vital needs.
3. She's got a way with words -- and men!
Parton is known for her "Dollyisms". World leaders would find it hard to argue with her quit wits and killer boobage.
4. She is always prepared
The world can't throw anything at Dolly that she won't greet with a ready smile and a plan.
5. She's passionate
If Dolly Parton was president every state of the union address would end with a stirring rendition of "I Will Always Love You."
6. She takes no prisoners
Do not cross her or President Parton will come after you with her magic truth-telling lasso. Wait, I confused her with Wonder Woman. I REGRET NOTHING.
7. Because MISS PIGGY
Who does Dolly love? Miss Piggy. And who has always had aspirations of being a killer vice president?
MISS PIGGY.
Now that's a ticket you can ride all the way to the bank!