I Don't Need A Man To Spoil Me — I Work Hard Enough To Spoil MYSELF

Recently, someone told me I was spoiled. 

Usually I'd see that as an insult, but on that day I was feeling particularly sassy and took it as a compliment. I pay my own bills, handle my own shit and buy myself (and my pets) gifts because I can. 

I'm spoiled because I'm successful enough to spoil myself. 

Of course I grew up in a middle-class family, in a decent neighborhood, and while I wasn't handed a Mercedes or lived in a mansion, I never did without. I was happy and hashtag blessed to have parents who sometimes spoiled me. I was grateful for it then, and I'm grateful for it now. 

But now it's not coming from Mom and Dad. It's coming from me. 

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Everyone struggles in life to get what they want, and very rarely is anything handed out — except for maybe if you're in the 1% and Taylor Swift is your best friend. Which in that case, I hate you and also want to be you. 

No, usually you have to work for it. You have to put in the time and effort to create the life you want. You should always be appreciative of what you have, but you shouldn't refuse to grow out of laziness or fear. Your happiness is worth the struggle. 

Personally I've found that many women have no problem doing this when it comes to their career. They're clear about the kind of job they want, and they can go after it full force. They're empowering, inspiring and we make sure to let them know it. 

While this wasn't always the case, boss career ladies are praised for their passion and dedication. This is not the same shared attitude when it comes to women who know what kind of relationship they want. 

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Women stay quiet about what they want in their relationships because it seems "too much" to ask. They don't want to come off as needy or clingy or over demanding. 

Well no more. Fuck that. 

If you can put forth the energy to land that job or lose that weight, than you should be able to do the same in all areas of your life.

Don't settle because it's easy or you think people will try to make you feel bad for wanting more. 

Being vocal about what you want isn't selfish. It's necessary to your health, wellbeing and happiness. It makes you a better person and better able to contribute to the world.