11 Struggles Only Interracial Couples Understand
Here's how an interracial couple is different from a same race couple.
DavideAngelini | Shutterstock Being in a relationship is like riding a rollercoaster: It starts off slow and pleasant, and you can somewhat enjoy it. Then, all of a sudden, it speeds up. The next thing you know, you're going up and down, then sideways and up again and down again, and then you're upside down and then right side up, and so on and so forth.
You either enjoy the ride or you swear to never go back in it again. Yes, relationships are definitely an interesting rollercoaster ride. But what's interracial dating like? Well, let's just say it really throws you for some curves.
It has its upsides, of course. You're opening your eyes and widening your horizons to a whole new world while you're getting to know your partner. You get to show them things from your culture and vice versa.
But as with roller coasters, you don't always go up. You go down, sideways, and upside down.
In addition to the usual relationship struggles and conflicts, being an interracial couple has its own set of struggles and conflicts that really challenge the couple involved. And this will continue following them from the day they go on their first date to the days after they exchange vows and tie the knot.
We live in a time where there's certainly more acceptance of interracial couples in the media and as a whole, but there are still awkward moments we encounter — especially from (ignorant) people who have never experienced interracial dating.
Sometimes, people forget that we are no longer in the 1950s when it was illegal to be with someone of another race. Reactions to interracial couples in the media are still sometimes met with hostility (remember that infamous Cheerios commercial?).
We may have come a long way since then, but we still have a ways to go.
Here are 11 struggles only interracial couples understand:
1. When you first start dating, race is all anyone can talk about.
As if you aren't aware of your and your partner's race at all times.
2. People say weird, inappropriate things.
You're real people who are in love.
3. People assume you're not dating — and you constantly have to correct them.
Hello? You're holding each other's hands after all.
4. People always say your mixed-race babies are going to be "soooooo cute".
You two haven't even had the babies' conversation yet.
5. Or worse, people say, "But you know your kids will be half white/Black/Hispanic" like it's a bad thing.
You both know what your future babies will be.
6. You pronounce things differently.
Or you call things by different names. "No honey, it's not dreadlocks. My hair isn't dreadful. It's just locks."
7. People use your relationship as an example that there is no longer racism.
Um, no.
8. Just because you fell in love doesn't mean it's always easy to have a conversation about racism.
You two grew up in two completely different cultures.
9. People think you're "self-hating" and assume you have something against dating someone from your race.
Nope, things just happened this way.
10. Everyone makes a "Guess who's coming to dinner?" reference when you mention you're going to meet the parents.
Clever... not.
11. You have to get comfortable with standing out like a sore thumb sometimes.
Then getting depressed that you still stand out like a sore thumb.
Nicole Weaver is a senior writer for Showbiz Cheat Sheet whose work has been featured in New York Magazine, Teen Vogue, and more.