3 Questions To Ask Yourself When You're Finally Ready To Stop Dating Jerks
You deserve better.
You've been plagued by one bad dating experience after another. After being involved in a series of terrible relationships, you promise yourself that you'll finally start fresh.
Yet, you notice that you keep attracting the same type of men. Although you're not making a conscious effort to do so, you can't escape your relationship history.
How can you break out of this vicious cycle? Is it even possible?
The answer is of course, yes! It may not seem like it when you're in the heat of the moment, but there are many ways that you can stop going from one failed relationship to another. The trick is analyzing the patterns that you fall into.
Ask yourself these three questions for clarity into why the patterns keep repeating:
- Is there a common factor between each relationship?
- Before getting into said relationships, have you actively worked on finding genuine happiness?
- Are you actually sabotaging yourself on purpose?
We took these questions to our Experts, and you'll be surprised by what their insight reveals.
Our panel features John Gray (yes, the author of Men Are From Mars And Women Are From Venus!), dating and relationships expert Charles Orlando, Life Coach Barbara Schiffman, Counselor Kelly Crossing, and Hypnotherapist Laura Rubinstein. They stress that breaking your bad dating habits and getting the love you deserve starts with YOU.
One great point raised by Barbara is: "I kind of find that if women are doing things they love [doing], they're more attractive ... Energetically, they're radiating who they are. So people are more in that mode also...show up in their life."
The good news is that science also corroborates her well-founded claim.
According to CNN, the real reason you end up dating the same guys over and over again is because you're mentally wired to do so. After surveying over 2000 men, the study found that their partner selection was heavily influenced by their parent's traits.
Director of the Council for Relationships Stephen Treat states that, "Your psyche wants to go back to the scene of the crime, so to speak, and resolve that parental relationship."
Our brains seek out people who are familiar so we can remain in our comfort zone. This explains why so many people attract partners who physically and emotionally resemble their parents.
All of this said, even though you're wired to fall for certain type, you can still destroy those patterns. It all depends on whether you're in tune with your wants and needs.
Here's the bottom line.
In life, you have two options: You can either use their advice wisely and finally break out of your relationship rut. Or you can choose to not change your life and nothing will change.
Whatever you decide tells the universe whether or not you're fine with the direction your love life is heading in.
If you're up for the challenge, we're positive you'll come out on top. But the choice is yours.
John Gray is the leading relationship expert in the world. He teaches people how to open their hearts and find love again at his Soul Mate Seminars. You can find out more about Soul Mate Seminars here.
Have more questions for our Experts? Reach out and ask! They're here to help.