Dating Tips: Stop Texting, Already! (And Other Digital Etiquette)
The noncommittal text, the mass text and more habits that need to go.
The following is based on a true story; the names and characters have not been changed because, well, it happened to me… okay?
[Phone rings]
Me (while sitting on couch, probably watching The Voice): Omg, it's that guy I met. He's calling me. He's calling me. Why is he calling me? THIS IS TERRIFYING!
Roommate: [Blank stare]
The End.
The point of that short, extremely sad, little tale is this: We have become so programmed to accept texts as the main form of communication, that when the guy we like actually calls to ask us out on a date, we are a little taken aback. And what's worse, we may even revere said guy as some sort of God for actually doing, let's be honest, what he's supposed to do.
Look, I'm not denying texting is great — we all do it, it's convenient, and honestly (and evidently from my momentary freak out), we're not all big phone talkers.
But the fact remains, people (namely prospective suitors) seldom just ring you up these days; this depressing reality of only perpetuates itself because in today's dating world, every crumb is a meal. In other words, we've come to expect so little, that the slightest gesture seems grand. The ease and convenience of the digital era can ultimately be viewed as the root of this problem.
To dig a little deeper, we've polled people around town to sound-off on the top five worst texting habits.
1. Texting During A Date
Unless the guy you're with is a practicing physician (and on call that night), has a friend or family member who's nine months pregnant, or is an organ donor recipient, his phone really shouldn't even be on the table, let alone texting during your one-on-one interactions. "One guy I went on a date with was actually in a group text with his buddies making plans for after our dinner." Um, can you say dealbreaker?
2. The Noncommittal Text
Guy you like: Hey, what are you up to this weekend?
You: I don't know, probably hanging out with friends, but I'll be around. How about you?
Guy you like [on Monday]: Cool. So how was your weekend?
UM, WHAT?!?!
3. Picture Messaging Random, Meaningless Stuff
So, while these can sometimes be humorous, pic messages should only be used when they apply. For instance, a shot of a ping pong place you smoked your date in, with the message: "Rematch?" Guys don't always like it if you go too random. "I get all excited this girl I like is texting me, and it's a picture of her dog. Or her lunch or something. It's like, thanks?"
4. The Mass Text
Look, we get you're probably textually active with other people. But, there's just no need to send an obvious mass message such as: "Hey, what are you getting into tonight?" What's sad is you definitely think you're being stealth, well here's the thing: we know that one didn't just go out to us. And when it comes to the beginning of a courtship, we have zero desire to be in a chatroom. At least attempt to make us feel special by making specific plans to hang out solo. Keep Reading ...
More juicy stories from YourTango:
- 8 Modern Dating Rules Every Single Should Know
- 25 Date Night Ideas That Aren't Cheesy
- 5 Dating Tips For Finding The One
5. Texting For No Damn Reason
"I get frustrated when guys text me things like: 'Hi'. I think texting should really only be used for something specific, or at least have something actionable with it, like 'meet me here', 'where are you', or maybe a 'you look hot standing in that bathroom line.'" In other words, should you boys want to engage in some light convo (which, in case you didn't know, girls are all about): Pick. Up. The. Phone. It really makes all the difference in the world.
For a limited time only, receive our free eBook, Break Up With Your Ex (a $5 value), yours free when you sign up for YourTango's free, daily newsletter.