Are Strip Clubs REALLY A Relationship Threat?
Before you freak out...
Last Spring in the beginning stage of a new relationship, I joined a group of friends (two couples and one single gal) on an adventure to the world renowned Sin City, Las Vegas. Everyone going had already seen its glory but me, so I gave fair warning that I would be making the most of our getaway, and the fun would begin on the plane over.
Needless to say, by the time we landed and made it to our hotel before noon, I was already on a deep-seeded buzz and well on my way into being drunk. I lasted that way for days, gone enough to keep myself in a mental party girl state, yet sober enough to remain classy and not do anything that would make me that girl who'd never be invited on a trip again.
One of the most fun times us girls had during our excursion took place at the Thunder From Down Under male stripper review.
Last Saturday, I journeyed to Seattle with a longtime friend with no specific destination in mind and decided to just wing our fun for the evening. We enjoyed gloriously strong cocktails at a sleek bar/lounge, ate at a high-end restaurant, and made ourselves out like tourists by visiting the Space Needle. By the time the later part of the evening came sneaking up on us, we found ourselves full and tiring out.
We needed something to spark up a little energy. With a quick stop at Starbucks, we began brainstorming where we should go next. Like a true and true male, my friend Chris suggested DejaVu, the female strip joint down on 1st not too far from Pike Place Market. Being single and open minded to new and unaccomplished experiences, I agreed to check out the local nudists and see what all the hype was about.
After having gone to both "Teams" and seeing how they operate, I've made some specific observations, rules, and suggestions from my time at watching this profession so you can decide for yourself if you are asking "are strip clubs bad for your relationship?" or that they are just another harmless collective of folks making a living like everyone else except, in the buff of course.
The Men's Team
Observations:
- They never get completely naked. They will parade around in speedos, boxers, and costumes resembling heroic professions like fireman and police officers, you may even get a view of someones' rear end before the end of the night, but no anaconda surprise, EVER.
- They work solo AND as a pack. Male strippers actually concoct dance routines as if they are on a naughty version of So You Think You Can Dance, except the talent is gravely lacking. Hey, it's about muscles, not two steppin' right?
- They love the use of water. To tack focus onto their bodies, the men will shower themselves in H2O whenever necessary to glisten in the club lighting. Maybe it reminds them of showering at home, only with the added perk of an audience of ravenous, sexually starved women cheering them on for being so dirty.
- They love Bride To Be's. There's a reason why strip clubs/shows are so commonly tied to bachelor/bachelorette parties. Male dancers of the stripping sort love using a woman's last night of freedom as a catapult to beating her heart like a pinata by dragging her onto stage and allow her to feel up what she will soon be missing out on forever once she says I do.
- They run around like toddlers and highly encourage groping. You heard me right, these guys embrace the oncoming of you copping a feel if they end up anywhere within your personal bubble space and will shoot you a seductive smirk and enthusiastic holler in the process. Fit men of these sorts want you to grab what they've got; what men don't want is women frantic and seemingly desperate to ravage them.
Rules & Suggestions:
- Make sure you get prime seating. The guys may frolic around the room, but any ladies in the back will hardly get anything close to an experience the women up front and center do.
- If you're worried about a possible makeup meltdown in resemblance of a Picasso painting or are just plain not interested in getting wet, hang in the back of the room or stay home. Women want to be pretty, men like to get messy. Stripping is no exception to the rule.
- If you want the attention and prime favor of the fellas, come bearing a veil even if you aren't getting married. I learned this lesson by watching multiple women get dragged up on stage for personal dances, solely because they had a ring on their finger. Hey, I paid money too! If you truly want to get your Benjamins' worth, play the role of a bride to be for an evening and make up a fictional fiance with a story of romantic proposal and wedding date just in case you are questioned in front of everyone for specifics. What harm is there in going that extra mile and letting out your inner bad girl every now and then right?
The Female Team
Observations:
- They ply you with alcohol. The moment you walk into the dimly lit room and pop a squat at one of their teeny tables or luxury seats right by the stage, some half naked vixen is alertly at your side with a smile on her face and offering up an endless supply of whatever booze your heart desires, and usually for free (as they should be, considering you're basically handing over a kidney to get in the club to begin with). The male strip show had a bar in the back of the venue where women had to go and order for themselves and bring their drinks back to the tables themselves. The female strippers are crafty in getting more money that way by the seduction of cost-free cocktails and beer, knowing full well it will eventually be found in a dancer's thong before you call it a night.
- They love seeing women just as much, if not a little more than men. A woman by the stage name Javon had her sights set on me and completely overlooked my friend whose idea it was to come in the first place. She grilled me on my reasons for coming, clasped onto my shoulders and set in motion an attempt at a mood setting massage, and cried out an offer for a couples dance where she proclaimed to be "real good and fun with those" and made promise of a cost that she was sure was a steal. I have never played on that side of the field, and to each his own, but even if I were to open myself up that much to sexual discovery, a stripper right alongside the likes of a prostitute would be my last choice to get it. I am confident enough to know that even though I'd never go there. If I wanted to hook up with another woman, I sure as hell wouldn't have to pay for it.
- The majority hate what they do, and it shows. Sure they can perform dynamic gymnastics on a pole and get fully nude for your shell-shocked eyes, but a lot of them rarely smile and are lacking delight with the striptease they're putting on. Their moves are routine, but unlike male strippers who are enthusiastic and glow with happiness, it's all about shutting off any personality shine through and just putting the goods out for show so they can collect their green and go home.
- They have awkward cleaning intermissions. After we watched about a handful of women shimmy, shake and sell sex on heels, the music changed. A couple of girls dressed in more clothing yet, still very provocatively presented, took to the stage with towels and spray, dousing the mirrored wall and swiping all traces of women from the poles. All I could think about was two things: How degrading and sad it is that such a job exists and that women actually WANT to do it, and one can only imagine the bountiful mess of sweat and other body fluids being cleansed away. Nothing says clean and classy more than a duo of ladies mopping up nasty from other ladies.
Rules & Suggestions:
- If you're a straight, curious woman, never go to a gentlemen's club alone. They get revved up whenever another female steps through the door since it is not a common occurrence, and they are dying to see more of us. Why? Because men are easy to play, and women are harder to coerce. Who doesn't love a feisty challenge?
- Seating doesn't matter; expect to be bombarded the moment your butt finds a seat and never be left alone. My friend Chris informed me that some club in Arizona was far more ruthless than what we experienced, but if that is the case, I don't know how anyone can tolerate that kind of pushing. If you wanted to just drop in, peek at some melons and pussycats and call it a night, chances are it won't happen without you handing over most of the money you arrived with before events even started. They know how easy it is to sexually manipulate all walks of life coming in the door. The majority have been doing their job longer than you presume they have. It's all about playing the cash game and they have no shame in getting in your face, practically putting their own weekly manicured claws down your pockets to get it at, by whatever cost it takes.
- Clothing is merely optional; you WILL get a full showing. Men are more classy in the way where they will leave the audience to their own imaginations to make their own presumptions of how their third leg may look under the thong they refuse to peel off. Women will hold nothing back and will let nothing remain a mystery. To them, breasts are breasts, and between the legs is icing on the cake bound to lure in the men easy enough to fall under the spell. All guys watch porn, it's nothing they aren't used to seeing already, the ladies are just happy to present it to you in the flesh (as long as they are financially rewarded well for their boldness of course).
- If you want to go home with the rent or grocery money you showed up with, lay low and stay sober. The mastery to female strip joints is coercing you with free or super cheap liquor (lots and lots of liquor) to get you drunk enough to lose all common sense, and honing in on easy, visible targets. If you don't want to leave the club crying over having made it rain and trying to figure out how you managed to allow yourself to pittle away just about everything you had in a matter of minutes, then stand firm on a budget and STICK TO IT. There are plenty of other men (and sometimes women) who can send these ladies on a shopping spree with the dough they bring to the table, you're not required to give up all you got.
From all that I have seen, both genders play the game well. It's all in good fun really... most of the time.
No male strippers were witnessed trying to lure women into more than just a strip show. They did their dancing and created a great atmosphere for everyone involved. Female strippers, however, will do whatever it takes to get paid. They will ask you your name and try to get equal by waxing poetic about life with jokes and flirty touches, regardless if a man is taken or not. They don't see any man as a husband/boyfriend/fiance, what they see is their next meal ticket.
To be fair, not ALL scandalous behavior is done by the women, and it's not a massive threat overall to lose sleep over. So, are strip clubs bad for your relationship? Yes, it could, but only solely on the actions of your significant other. Just like the temptation can be found from a co-worker or random run in off the street, no one can make anyone choose to cheat except the cheater him/herself.
It's all about trust, and if strip club outings make you uneasy, it would be best to discuss your feelings on the matter early on in a relationship in the most non-attacking your partner's character way.