The 5 Commandments Of Breaking Up With Your Ex

Years ago, in the pre-internet age, getting over an ex was pretty straightforward. You stopped calling him, avoided places he might be, and gave back that comfy sweatshirt you loved sleeping in.

Nowadays, breaking up is a lot more complicated—Facebook and Twitter provide you with up-to-the-minute details about your ex's new life; your cellphone is full of picture of you two together; your iTunes playlist still houses the "For My Greatest Love" playlist. These and other digital reminders make it virtually impossible to move on.

With this in mind, YourTango has declared February 13 as National Break Up With Your Ex Day—and this video tells you what you need to do. Because really, no one needs to see Valentine's Day photos of their ex and his new girlfriend laughing over chocolate cake. If you're itching for more relationship advice, check out www.BreakUpWithYourEx.com to learn more.

TRANSCRIPT:

Oh, how hard it is to get over an ex.  Especially when Facebook updates, tweets, and Foursquare checkins provide a constant reminder of your ex.  Thus we do proclaim the “5 Commandments of Breaking Up With Your Ex”.  Brought to you by YourTango with a little help from history’s greatest breakups.

History could’ve been rewritten if only Anne Boleyn knew how to end things properly with Henry VIII.  And may not have lost her head had she followed the fifth commandment of breaking up with your ex - remove photographs of your ex from your profile and untag all photos of you together.  Untagging is a symbolic action that says “I’m moving on”.  So click on your ex’s head and let your own cyber [inaudible].

Mark Antony and Cleopatra were one of those on-again, off-again that could’ve benefitted from less communication.  Charmed by Cleo’s exotic beauty, Mark Antony followed her to the ends of the empire.  He may have avoided an untimely death were he able to follow the fourth commandment of breaking up with your ex - unfollow your ex on twitter.  Don’t invest another minute reading into your ex’s every fleeting thought.  Stop tagging along and start following somebody new. 

Sonny and Cher’s groovy kind of love captured America’s heart and gave hope to short mustachioed men everywhere.  But it was doomed from the start.  Perhaps Cher would’ve saved herself heartache had she followed the third commandment of breaking up with your ex - delete all playlists and music that reminds you of your ex.  Delete or hide them for now, you can always add them back later.  Focus on your solo career and maybe you too will believe in life after love. 

Just because you keep getting it wrong doesn’t mean you should stop trying.  Just ask Elizabeth Taylor.  With all those memories cluttering your life, the only possible way to move on is to create space, literally, by following the second commandment of breaking up with your ex- delete all photos of you and your ex on your computer and mobile phone.  Of course, in Miss Taylor’s case, this would take a very long time, but would clear a lot of memory. 

It’s a pity about Jen and Brad.  While Jennifer Aniston cannot seem to find a new love, Brad and Angelina’s love only seems to flourish and multiply . . . and multiply.  If only she could erase the whole thing.  But what she can do is execute the first and most important commandment of breaking up with your ex - unfriend your ex on Facebook.  While this may seem rigid or even downright Draconian in its severity, it’s a necessary evil.  He doesn’t need to see your sexy new profile photograph, and you don’t need to be privy to the updates on his exciting new dating life.  In fact, Jen would be well served to follow all five commandments. 

So don’t dilly-dally.  Clear your heart, click away your cyber clutter and get a fresh start this Valentine’s Day. Go on now.