3 Reasons To Run Like Hell If He Works In "Finance"

They don't call 'em WOLVES of Wall St. for nothing ...

Written on Jul 09, 2015

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I've been on a few dates with men who work in "finance" — as in, they can't explain to me in 10 words or less what it is exactly that they do with all those numbers and dollar signs (and hey, as a creative girl who writes for a living, I'm not about to ask them to elaborate).

I'm always initially attracted to them because of the way they can rock a suit à la Barney Stinson and how they exude so much confidence and purpose.

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But as soon as that tie is loosened and that second Jack-and-Coke is dry, their horns come out.

There was one guy who worked at Barclay's — he told me he was depressed, then proceeded to punch out a ceiling light and cackle as he was thrown out of the bar.

There was another date who started work at 5:30 every morning and was so obsessed with his alma mater that blue and gold were the only colors he could see or wear outside of the office. Naturally, he'd also party as if he was back in college, getting so drunk that he'd unleash his pent-up wrath on the nearest server, barback or cab driver he could find.

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I'd like to say I'm the only person who's witnessed such nightmares, but sadly, the reverse is true.

There's evidence popping up all over the Internet that men like this are a dime a dozen in the money biz, which has given me three more reasons why I'll be wary of dating more finance guys:

1. Money Comes First (And Always Will)

As HowAboutWe points out, the great part about dating someone in finance is that they probably have a large disposable income they can spend on romantic dinners, once-in-a-lifetime experiences, and, well, you. However, their job will always come first. How much they make will almost always come up on the first date (UGH), and most likely, any emotional problems you have will have to be explained in dollars and cents for them to understand and/or sympathize. 

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2. They Don't Get It When You're Not Interested

This creepy list was written by an investment banker who simply couldn't take unreturned texts and calls as an answer that a first date didn't want to see him again. So he Googled her and proceeded to pen this 1,600-word email asking why she wasn't into him. Uh, talk about a HIGH opinion of yourself.

3. Their Social Norms AREN'T Normal

Inspired by the creepy letter above, Gawker assembled 10 more horror stories about dating finance guys. What they prove is that the insanely long hours, pressure and overall crazy nature of the industry strips these poor fellas of the social cues and norms that by which the rest of us live our daily lives.

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It also seriously screws up their ability to relate to other people. So stalking exes internationally, logically analyzing breakups, imagining connections and thinking affection is purchasable seems normal to them. (Those things just scare the crap out of the rest of us.)

I'm not saying that every single guy who works in finance is like this. I know plenty of guys who have finance-related job titles and are still sweet, affectionate and well-mannered gentlemen.

But obviously, there are a considerable amount of guys out there who are seriously lowering their stock.