Tips That Make Living Together Easy
Compromise, divide household chores and other tips on how to survive cohabitation.
Whether you're getting hitched or embracing the moderntradition of premarital cohabitation, moving in with your significantother is a big deal. From fighting for the covers every night to wakingup with the person you love each morning, this new chapter in your lifemay be rife with happy moments and potential conflicts. Whilethere's no foolproof plan for avoiding relationship complications afteryou move in together, following these tips will help make the transitionthat much easier. The Frisky: Three Questions To Ask Yourself Before Moving In Together
1. Establish Ground Rules
Now is the time to lay down the house rules that not only benefit thetwo of you as romantic partners, but as roommates, too. Whether it's "Keep the toilet seat down," "No stuffed animals on the bed," or "Dirtyclothes go in the hamper, not on the floor," getting clear on oneanother's guidelines will help keep the romantic spark between youalive. The realities of living together aren't always an aphrodisiac,but you can focus on making the best of what you've got by getting clearon your shared boundaries.
2. Redecorate Together
Whether one of you is moving into the other's home, or you're bothmoving into a new place together, collaborating on the décor will notonly bring you closer, it will give each of you a sense of ownership inyour new abode. At the same time, a home makeover gives you the chanceto find out how you work together as you blend your lives.
3. Divide And Conquer The Housework
When I moved in with my now husband three years ago, we quicklyestablished I'd do the dishes and he'd do the laundry, a set-up that haskept us both happy and sane. I'm thrilled I never have to countquarters and lug our dirty clothes to the Laundromat. He's ecstatic hecan enjoy dinners we take turns cooking without worrying about thepost-meal mess. He takes out the garbage and cleans the bathroom. Isweep, dust, and vacuum. Neither of us loves doing household chores, butit's so much easier getting through them knowing we're getting equalhelp from the other. Nothing kills the mood faster than resentment overlingering dust bunnies in the bedroom.
4. Tackle Your Finances
Before you move in together, talk money. Are you going to have a jointaccount? How will expenses be split? What about insurance? And don'tforget that your financial discussions should continue after you unpack.Check in with each other periodically to make sure you're both on thesame page financially. Set a common savings goal—say, a trip to Spain,or buying a home—that creates a sense of shared partnership and helpsyou both stay on the same financial track. The Frisky: Nine Things You Should Figure Out Before Moving In Together
5. Get Out Of The House
Once you're in the comfort zone, it can be tempting to spend yourevenings ordering Thai take-out and catching up on your Netflix. Resistthe trap! It's essential to the vitality of your relationship that youget out and explore the world together. Go see a band you love, catch amovie, go out for dinner, work out together, party with friends. Sharingnew experiences creates stronger bonds and a deeper sense of intimacy.
6. Maintain Your Privacy
The occasional communal shower aside, all other bathroom activitiesshould be kept private. Maybe you're in that phase where you want to doeverything together, but some things you should do by yourself, period. The Frisky: Girl Talk: We Survived Our First Move Together (Just Barely)
7. Spend Time Apart
Enjoy quality time without each other. Now more than ever, it's important to nurture your otherrelationships—including the relationship you have with yourself. Notonly do those bonds give you a more well-rounded support system—oneyou'll need down the road—time away makes time spent together that muchsweeter.
8. Show Your Love
Express your appreciation for your lover. Bring her flowers, bake him abatch of cookies, put on sexy underwear, or jump his bones. After all,relationships aren't rocket science. Sometimes, it's the small gesturesthat go a long way in making sure you don't turn into an old marriedcouple before you're, well, an old married couple.
By Wendy Atterberry for The Frisky
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