Is One Month Into Dating Too Soon To Get Hitched?
The pros and cons of marrying someone you hardly know.
Word on the street is that Khloe Kardashian will be tying the knot with her LA Lakers boyfriend Lamar Odom this upcoming weekend. If these rumors are correct, that means the two will be agreeing to spend the rest of their lives together after only about a month of dating. But is marrying someone after such a brief time really such a terrible idea? Or does doing so have its benefits? Marriage: Sacred Or Smashed Institution?
We've thought it over, and come up with some reasons in favor of and against marrying someone you hardly know.
The Pros:
1. It can work. George W. Bush popped the question to Laura Welch three weeks after he met her, and married her just a few weeks after that. Today, they've been married over thirty years, raised two children, and survived some of the toughest circumstances a political couple can face (a lost local election, a contested national election, an unpopular presidency, two wars, etc.). So, yes, there are cases when marrying someone you've just met works out just fine.
2. You're tying the knot while things are still hot. You know those couples who date for years before tying the knot? And how their newlywed phase is comfy and cozy and romantic, but not particularly sexy? Marrying someone you hardly know means you will not be one of those boring newlywed couples. No, you will be the sexy newlywed couple. The newlywed couple that goes at it every day of the week and twice on Sundays. You will be that newlywed couple that people will avert their eyes from and barf in their mouths over. Why? Because most smitten couples are that way during the first year, regardless of whether they're married or not.
3. There are no guarantees, regardless of how long you date someone. Lots of couples who dated for years before getting married get divorced. Lots of couples who dated for weeks before gettinng married get divorced. Waiting doesn't guarantee a successful, lasting marriage. Marriage And Health: Damned If You Do And Don't
The Cons
1. You hardly know each other. Yes, you know that he likes red sauces more than cream sauces. And he knows you fell off your bike in front of your whole third grade class and never quite lived it down. But do you really know each other's politics, beliefs and ideals? Do you know how the other handles money, stress, and career shifts? Do you know how you interact with each other's friends and families? And do you know that you see yourselves in a similar place, five, ten, and fifty years down the road? 50% Of Women Regret Marrying Their Husbands
2. Living with people you hardly know isn't easy. You know when you and your new best friend at the office are having an amazing time hanging out on your lunch breaks and cracking each other up during after-work happy hours and then one of you suddenly needs a place to live and you decide to become roommates and realize that you can't stand each other? Now imagine doing this with the person you just started dating. Imagine that you're finding his underwear on the bathroom floor every morning and he's cleaning up after your dirty dishes every night. Imagine your new man is your roommate, because that's what he will be if you marry him.
3. You might not actually love each other. You might just be in lust with each other. And lust, while a great jumping off point for love, isn't love and isn't the stuff that long-term relationships are made of.