7 Ways Male Birth Control Will Change EVERYTHING

Researchers in China may have succeeded in developing what people have dreamed about for centuries: effective, reversible male birth control that has no serious side effects (at least in the short-term). Consisting of 500 mg of testosterone undecanoate in tea seed oil, this experimental contraceptive injection was tested on 1,045 healthy males, aged 20-45 years old, for 30 months. Each study participant had fathered a child within the two years before the study began. Their female partners were between 18 and 38 years old. All had normal medical histories. 

The study found that, like the pill, the effectiveness of the injection was near 99%. If this male hormonal contraception is further developed and succeeds in reaching the market, how will it change the world? We've thought of a few ways.

1. Lots more drunken men in bars saying: "Don't worry, I'm on the shot."

2. Lots more pregnant women everywhere muttering to their girlfriends: "He said he was on the shot."

3. Sensitive New Age guys the world over finally able to prove that, yes, baby, if they could, they would be the ones to take the hormones.

4. The faster spread of diseases we'd prefer not to have. Sorry. We had to say it.

5. Happy, irresponsible bachelors everywhere no longer able to use the excuse of being "trapped" into parenthood.

6. Iconic Heart song, "All I Want To Do Is Make Love To You," no longer relevant.

7. With simultaneous invention of the time-travel machine, 90% of us not born.