Why Men Like Non-Traditional Sex

Finally. I thought I'd answer one of the big questions I've been asked over and over again, the question you ladies are dying to know the answer to. Are you ready?

We want anal sex because if we ask you if we can, and you say yes, even begrudgingly, then that is awesome. I don't even know if the majority of guys even like anal sex, but that you'd say "yes" to such a dirty, unladylike request is what makes it oh-so-worthwhile.

I had a girlfriend once who told me she loved doing it. She didn't, of course, but she loved me, and I loved her, and when she whispered in my ear one night that she'd love me to do that, I thought, "Awww, how romantic." She assumed that since I was a guy, I'd be into anal sex. I wasn't, and am not, but her loving offer was sizzling hot. Like, sizzling hot enough to make pancakes. Or waffles. WAFFLES!

Of course, weeks later, she asked me to itch a particular scratch of hers, and out came the silk scarves. Silk scarves? Really? Don't birthday magicians pull those out of sleeves? We tried it, and she tied me up with silk scarves. We did this more than once, and while it did nothing for me, the fact that it reduced her to a puddle of sentient liquid steel from which she would later reform herself a la "Terminator II" was what eventually turned me. And, huh, that's the point.

Men are a lil' bit obsessed with anal sex, sure, and it is clear our obsession is making many of you (even more) neurotic.

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Why Men Like Non-Traditional Sex

A man explains why men like "carnal posterior affection."

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