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Can you really tell in a month?!

Published on March 15, 2013 by love to love

Can you really tell in a month? I feel like we needed more time.? So this guy I was seeing for about a month recently told me that he feels like something is missing between us and that he really doesn't think things are working out the way he hoped they would. According to him he's supposed to feel something by now that tells him that he's in the right relationship but I don't see how a month of dating would tell you something like that. He's 27 years old and when I first met him he said that he was looking for a serious relationship with someone he can eventually marry and settle down with. He says we have a connection but something is missing. I'm just confused. I mean things were great and he agreed with me when I said that but he said that the past couple of days (3 days) he had been thinking about things and came to the conclusion that something is not there. I feel like it might be a physical connection, we've done some things but we haven't had sex yet so I think that's what he needs. I don't want to sleep with him though just to find out that's not what's missing because it would leave me even more hurt.

I just don't see how you can expect to find the person you want to spend your life with after just a month of dating. Am I wrong here? Shouldn't he have given us more time? He says he wants to stay in touch so I guess I'm hoping that eventually he'll realize that maybe we should try again and take things a little slower and see if something more can develop. I can't make him give us more time so I'm hoping by "staying in touch" he'll be reminded that we had a good thing going. He told me that he felt happy and comfortable. He could get used to waking up next to me. He told me "I'm not going anywhere". I just don't understand what was going through his mind in those 3 days. Just 4 days ago he said he was really happy.

ANSWERS

While it often takes months or years to be certain that someone is "The One", it takes much less time to realize, "This girl and I are not a good match for each other" Unless he's been pressuring you for sex, I wouldn't attribute this to that. Just take him at his word, and move on to someone else.

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