Mom Praised After Explaining Why She Didn't Punish Her Daughter Who Put A Hole In Their Wall
She knew her daughter already felt remorseful and didn't want to make her feel any worse.
Facebook A mother's parenting style is receiving praise after she explained the approach she takes with her daughter when disciplining her.
In December 2019, Rosie Lamphere, the co-founder of the blog Play At Home Mom and a mother of four, shared with her followers an incident that had happened with her middle child, Mia, and the unique approach she took to deal with it.
Lamphere explained why she chose not to yell at her daughter for putting a hole in the wall.
In Lamphere's post, she shared that her three daughters, Briella, 11, Mia, 9, and Sienna, 8, had been playing around together when her 9-year-old daughter put her "body through the drywall," leaving a huge hole in its wake.
"I walked upstairs to the damaged wall. The remorse was already displayed all over her body. She didn’t need me to make her feel guilty," Lamphere wrote. "She didn’t need me to shame her. She didn’t need me to make an already crappy situation worse."
Instead of yelling at her daughter, she listened to Mia's apology, and when she began freaking out about her father getting mad as well, Lamphere calmly told her that if she wasn't ready to tell him yet, there was no problem in waiting to do so.
When Lamphere went to tell her husband, she acknowledged that the two of them had two choices on how to deal with the incident. "One, scream and yell and make her feel more awful than she already does."
"Two, accept that little girl for each bit of awesome that she is... even in her mistakes. To realize that it was SO hard for her to come down and tell you how she made a mistake."
Instead of choosing the first option and potentially damaging their relationship with their daughter, Lamphere and her husband chose to simply forgive her and move on.
"Today, my daughter walks around with a little more trust. She walks around feeling loved and connected. She walks around knowing that she can tell her parents anything and that she is safe," Lamphere explained.
By listening and not raising her voice at her daughter, Lamphere proved the importance of open communication.
Choosing to immediately yell at your child as a parent can sometimes be extremely detrimental to your relationship. Yelling often shuts down communication and creates a confrontational atmosphere.
In contrast, listening allows parents to understand the underlying issues and challenges their children face. By actively listening, parents can gain insights into their children's experiences, enabling them to respond in a more empathetic and constructive manner.
Lamphere echoed that sentiment during an interview with Good Morning America after her post went viral. She opened up about never wanting to "corrupt" the relationship that she has with any of her daughters, especially due to a harmless accident.
"The consequence was the hole in the wall and she had already experienced all the guilt from that. She didn't need anything from me," Lamphere pointed out. "Communication is very important with our children."
"We talk about mistakes a lot. No one's perfect. We try to show them how we can be vulnerable... it's important for them to see that so she [knows] we are not superheroes as parents."
Nia Tipton is a Brooklyn-based entertainment, news, and lifestyle writer whose work delves into modern-day issues and experiences.