Woman Lives In Her In Laws' Basement For Free But Wants To Switch Rooms With Them Because She 'Feels Suffocated' Downstairs
She seems to be forgetting whose house she's staying in.
BearFotos / Shutterstock Letting family live with you is exceptionally generous. Unfortunately, it doesn’t always go according to plan. One family learned this the hard way and quickly discovered that they might not be compatible housemates.
A husband and wife allowed their son and his family to move in with them, but problems soon arose.
“I have three kids,” the mom wrote on Reddit. “My son, let’s call him David, is 38. David got divorced a few years ago because he really wanted a kid, but his wife had no interest, so they divorced amicably.”
Luckily for David, he wasn’t alone for long. “He met his current girlfriend, Jennifer," his mother explained. "Jennifer has three kids from her previous marriage. After a few weeks of going out, Jennifer told David that she [was] pregnant. David was happy."
“David has a good job but couldn’t afford a partner and soon four kids,” she continued. "Plus, his landlord was evicting him (the landlord was selling the place)."
David's parents generously offered to allow him and Jennifer to move into their newly renovated basement, which has two private bedrooms separate from the upstairs. Jennifer's 10 and 12-year-old kids would also have their own rooms upstairs.
“We won’t be charging rent and can even help with their meals,” she added.
Unfortunately, the situation has not remained peaceful by any means. “Initially, everything was fine. Now, [the] baby is 6 months [and] Jennifer constantly yells about how much she hates this basement (we clearly could hear)," the mom wrote. "It has been a non-stop struggle and fight downstairs. We tried not to get involved.”
Despite the parents’ attempt to not become a part of the downstairs drama, they were dragged into it anyway.
“Jennifer told my husband today that we should be the ones living in the basement because with now four kids, they need more space,” she said. “My husband told her that he has MS, and we specifically made upstairs accessible for him. Plus, it’s his property.”
Jennifer didn’t react well to that. “She didn’t say anything, but later, David came upstairs and got angry that Jennifer has been crying, feeling suffocated here, and that we are not kind to her."
Family relationships are often incredibly complicated.
Family makes up some of the closest relationships we have, but they can also be the hardest to handle.
According to wellness coach Elizabeth Scott, “While family relationships can bring support, joy, and other wonderful benefits into our lives, these relationships can also bring stress, particularly when there’s unresolved conflict.”
When familial conflict arises, Scott recommends having an honest talk with the other person, but only if you are both open to doing so. They also said that sometimes it’s best to just “forgive and forget” and move on.
However, there are some situations in which it’s best to cut someone out of your life, even a family member.
“If what the other person did was abusive and there’s absolutely no remorse or reason to expect things to be different in the future, you can severely limit your dealings with this person or cut off contact altogether,” Scott advised.
This family is in a unique situation since they are not merely seeing each other at occasional reunions or gatherings — they live together. If things don’t improve after a frank and honest discussion, it might be time for these parents to change that.
Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer for YourTango who covers entertainment, news, and human interest topics.