5 Tiny Signs You Like Him Way More Than He Likes You
See the signs before he disappears into the fog.
You’re dating this cute guy. He’s a real charmer. You like him a lot, but you have a disturbing thought: Maybe when you're alone and not with him, you wonder if you like him more than he likes you. You're unsure if he’s as into you as you are into him, and you might be a victim of unrequited love. You want to find out (no, you need to find out) because the answer to your predicament can mean the difference between a healthy, fruitful relationship and one that sputters haltingly before evaporating into a fog of hurt and regret.
Here are 5 tiny signs you like him way more than he likes you:
1. He’s hesitant about discussing his feelings
Or maybe he says something like, “Well, I’m not sure how I feel about us.” You’ve got to trust me on this is code for he’s not into you, so you should think about unceremoniously dumping him.
Harsh? Perhaps. But there are so many guys out there, and you deserve someone who values you and your time instead of being with someone who’s a teeter-totter not sure if they want you. And if you're not happy with the dynamic, where you like him more than he likes you, you should bear in mind that a relationship should not get in the way of true happiness. It should augment it.
2. He tries to change who you are
In other words, he’s just not that fond of who you are right now. And how does he express this? Chances are, he’ll be nit-picky about you and bring up your supposed “flaws” and “problems.” Instead of appreciating who you are as an individual, he’ll find fault in you. If he were really into you and loved you, he’d be much more likely to compliment you instead of making you feel bad about yourself.
3. You’re always the one who shows affection
No, affection is not the same thing as physical intimacy. By “affection” I mean stuff like cuddling, holding hands, and engaging in intimate eye contact. If you’re always the one who initiates this kind of affection — while he only initiates physical intimacy — it’s quite possibly one of the signs you're more into him than he is into you.
New Africa via Shutterstock
This isn’t a hard-and-fast rule of course. Some guys are just shy and introverted. If you’re dating a usually outgoing guy and still always initiating affection with him, you should probably rethink this relationship.
4. He doesn’t introduce you to his family
Or he’s hesitant about doing that. If you've already introduced him to your family but he doesn’t reciprocate, there’s a reason. And often, the reason is he’s not completely into you.
5. You’re almost always the one who texts or calls first
You’re the one making all the plans. And you’re the one who feels at ease introducing him to your friends. See where this is going? When you’re doing all these things and he isn’t giving much back, you’re probably more into him than he is into you. Whether you want to stay with him or not is a different matter, but why wouldn’t you want a guy who’s truly falling for you?
There you have it. Whether you’re dating a guy or already in a love relationship with him, keep your eyes open for these signs. And if you feel like something is “off” — that you’re more invested in this relationship than he is — chances are you're right. Cut your losses and move on.
Kelly P. Crossing is an experienced counselor and relationship expert who specializes in helping women build the lives and relationships they want by understanding their driving needs and how to meet them.