Don’t shoot the messenger.
By Jenn Burton — Written on Apr 13, 2017
Here's a hard question — when it comes to online dating, should you lose weight before you put yourself out there?
The feminist answer: "NO WAY! If he doesn’t like you the way you are, then tell him to SCREW OFF!"
The Internet troll answer: "%^$#@, even if you lose the weight, you’ll still need to do this, this and this you f$%king, fat cow!"
The real answer: This 100% depends on you.
Let me explain. As a dating expert and a curvy girl whose weight has fluctuated her entire life, I know what it is like to date while being skinny and to date while being significantly overweight. So my answer might surprise you.
Here’s the skinny: Your dating results will depend on how you feel about yourself, every single time.
An overweight woman who clearly values herself, who celebrates and genuinely loves her curves, will get A LOT more positive male attention than a skinny gal who clearly hates her body.
In fact, my own dating life pretty much sucked as a skinny and as an overweight chica because I hated myself so much.
Yet the moment I decided that it was too exhausting to carry around so much body-hate (body-hate functions like the tallest of brick walls around your heart; extraordinarily difficult to climb over and ridiculously hard to break through), and instead started to celebrate my body, men began leaping out of the woodwork and my dating life became magical.
Which means, in order for me to answer your question, I must first ask you one: Are you willing to stop chronically hating on your body before you start online dating?
If you can flip a switch and celebrate your curvy nature, then I say, by all means, put yourself out there and enjoy lots of positive male attention.
BUT If you legitimately can’t turn those nasty voices off inside your head whatsoever, then I suggest you start with finding an exercise routine you enjoy and someone who can support you with not only your weight goals but your body love as well.
Get in a consistent routine of taking great care of yourself (one or two months will work), and then start putting yourself out there. Get current pictures of yourself and create an enchanting, but genuine, profile on online dating sites. Try Tinder. Get out there!
Do this before you reach your goal weight. Why? Because it's so easy to put off life until you reach your goal weight.
Yet life is still happening, and your dating life should be too. When you practice loving yourself, there will be incredible men to love you as well. They are only waiting for you to give them the opportunity by tearing down your body-hate walls.