Love

Why You Should Stop Trying To Change Him

Why You Should Stop Trying To Change Him [EXPERT]

I once had a friend who was on the constant hamster wheel of "almost-men." She continuously dated men who were not her match, but whom she thought she could fix to become her match. She was miserable and exhausted most of the time from all her failed efforts.  Are You Building Your Dreams On Solid Ground?

She kept creating this same scenario over and over again with the men she dated. The men who had some self-respect left her pretty quickly, and the men who were as malleable as Jell-O stuck around for awhile, content to let her call all the shots in their lives. Then she would get frustrated and wiped out from trying to make them fit — which of course they never did.

No matter what, she ended up the same way over and over again: Alone.

Here's the deal, ladies: it's not up to you to make your man live up to his "potential." This is up to him. Love him for who is right now — or don't, and then let him go, so you're both free to find the right person for each of you. 25 Dating Dos And Don'ts [VIDEO]

When you meet a man and start your "relationship exploration," (my new term for dating), remember that he is showing you his best self in the beginning, just as you are showing up as your best self for him. Believe him and don't try to make him into someone he's not.

It's time to make better decisions for yourself in 2012. Start with knowing yourself, and from there you will be able to recognize who your soulmate is … and who he clearly is not, and avoid any temptation to try to change him. Are You Living The Love Lifestyle?

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This article was originally published at Dr Lara Fernandez. Reprinted with permission from the author.