The Miracle Question That Will Change The Direction Of Your Life
Build momentum to create your ideal future.
Stuck in cement.
That's how people feel when they are immobilized with indecision, lacking focus and clarity, often preventing them from taking steps to make changes and finding happiness. It is here that their frustration lies in feeling anxious and overwhelmed.
Being stuck in the past and unable to make changes in the present leads to difficulty creating a different future — a future more aligned with where they want to be. Why is this?
Often, it's because we continue to use the same technique or strategy for all of life's problems — mainly because it worked in the past — despite its current ineffectiveness in the present. "If all you have is a hammer, then everything looks like a nail." No wonder people feel stuck. One tool. One strategy. Few options.
What to do? You don't have to reinvent the wheel to create a new path, but simply ask yourself The Miracle Question.
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What is The Miracle Question? It's simple. What would your life look like if a miracle occurred? If you can visualize it, you can create it.
Suppose tonight while you're asleep a miracle happens, and when you wake up in the morning the problem(s) you are experiencing have suddenly disappeared. How would you know that a miracle had happened? What would be different? What would you be doing, thinking, or believing differently about yourself that would indicate that a miracle occurred?
The great thing about this question is that it allows you to imagine how your life would be if something miraculous occurred. What would your life look like if a miracle occurred? What exactly do you want for yourself?
It's not just about asking yourself the question, but more importantly, answering the necessary question.
An inherent component in Solution Focused Therapy, the Miracle Question springboards you from the present to the future with less focus on the past. I ask my clients to look into the future, and then take this visual picture and work backward with short and long-term goals.
This helps people visualize their future, and what it could look like through the creation of short and long term-goals mined with a clear focus and direction.
Regardless of where you are in your life or what you are doing, you can ask yourself the question. I take this approach with my patients in couples counseling, with marriages on the brink, and as a divorce mediator with myself. I use it because it works.
It is about forward thinking and building momentum to create your ideal future. So, ask yourself the question. Create your miracle and embark on a new path to the future. Be the change you need to be in your life.
Dr. Kristin Davin is a Clinical Psychologist specializing in marriage, divorce, dating, and relationships. She helps people build better relationships, whether it’s with their spouse, partner, children, siblings, parents, coworkers, or friends.