Self, Sex

The Double Standards Between Men & Women

contraceptives

Recently in the news, a woman speaks out for contraceptives and conservatives began to go stir crazy! Rush Limbaugh went way too far this time calling Sandra Fluke, a 30 year old law student and an advocate for female rights, a slut, whore and feminazi because she's spoke out on behalf of females everywhere for contraception. 7 Expert Opinions On Rush Limbaugh's "Slut" Comments

That is just wrong! This is just one more example of male domination attempting to suppress females. "Everything from property ownership to political activity, education to social mobility has been dominated by men throughout history.  Physical violence has been the mechanism of control and the threat of violence has been the agent of suppression wherever a system of inequality has been allowed to flourish."

Cultures emanating from fear and tyranny use physical violence to control, overpower and corrupt education, emancipation and personal freedom.  Hence, war. Third world countries have far greater suppression then we have in the United States, the melting pot of many cultures. In many third world countries, women cannot be educated, choose what they wear (clothing), choose who they marry and at what age and some countries even go as far as female genital mutilation or Clitoridectomy.  The World Health Organization defines Clitoridectomy as, "all procedures involving partial or total removal of the external female genitalia or other injury to the female genital organs whether for cultural, religious or other non-therapeutic reasons."(1)

In other words, there is no physical issue or disease being addressed by these mutilations. In fact, in studies done, these mutilations expose women and children to significant risk at childbirth. (2)

So let's face it. There have always been double standards between men and women when it comes to sex or anything sexually related. For example:

- When a boy has sex for the first time at a young age he gets a "high five" for coming into his manhood. A girl on the other hand is considered overly promiscuous if she's sexually active at a young age.

- Girls are supposed to wait until they get married to have sex, yet boys are encouraged to have sex prior to marriage, and in many cases are even setup with "someone of experience" for their first time (many times by their father).

- Porn is male dominated. The depiction of a man jamming his penis into the female as she bends over and fake groans is really not sensual and I have never met a female who makes love like a pornstar. Sex Video: My Husband Was Addicted To Porn

- Married men see their wives as a prim/proper mommy of their children and then complain that they aren't sexual enough or that sex is mundane and boring. If he wants his sex life spicy, doesn't he play a part in making that happen?

- When sex went bad, it's always the women's fault. "She lies there like a dead fish or a bump on a log." Really? Last time I checked it takes two to have great intimacy. When did great sex become the woman's responsibility alone? Have You & Your Partner Lost That Lovin’ Feeling?

- And let's not forget oral sex. Women are constantly ridiculed for not participating in oral sex while many men don't go there and you never hear a word talked about that.

- Men are typically comfortable with more male dominated sexual positions (missionary and doggy style) and not necessarily open to woman-on-top. 7 Simple But BLAZIN' Sex Positions You Need To Try... Tonight!

- Women having casual sex are sluts, while men are considered to have "a way with women."

Today, the average age of kids engaging in sexual activity for the first time is 17 years old. Assuming that is true, if the females involved are not using contraception, then who will be paying for the abortion or raising of the child when the teenager or young adult cannot afford to? We hear a lot about kids having kids, and if you look at the costs of unwed young mothers having children and the cost to the general consumer, it makes a lot more sense to allow contraception to be covered by insurance or distributed in the schools. Sandra Fluke is an advocate for women's rights and quite brave at that. Sandra Fluke & The S.L.U.T. Hypocrisy

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Not only was she a true lady, elegant and graceful with her presentation of her position, she was also quite direct and eloquent in her response to Rush Limbaugh's disgusting and uncalled for judgment of her. I was happy to hear that President Obama called and thanked her for standing up for what she believed in. Otherwise, what message are we giving to women everywhere who are willing to be brave and speak up? To just shut up and be quiet or we will be shut down? This is an outrage! What gives men like Rush Limbaugh and other men in government the right to treat us like trash when we speak out eloquently about a real issue that needs some resolve? 

The difference between contraception and most other drugs that insurance companies covers is that this type of contraception is specifically a woman's issue in men's eyes. I wonder how many men would like to be told what they can and can't do with their bodies. After all, women can't get pregnant on their own naturally and obviously men are not providing protection either or we wouldn't see so many teenage moms or unwanted pregnancies outside of marriage.

No matter how you feel about contraception and whether it should be covered by insurance, the real point here is this: We should all have the right to speak our truth and beliefs. I haven't heard of any of the men who've been speaking against this issue being called anything like a slut or a whore. It's not a wonder that women have been afraid to speak out because each time they do, the story gets turned around and she is blamed.

When I was in high school, there was a female classmate who was raped and I recall hearing kids talking about it and blaming her. This was quite shocking at the time because I knew the girl, who was sweet, more known as geeky, and definitely not promiscuous in any way. When she got back after the incident and people found out, it got so bad for her that she had to leave the school. Why? Because she was the victim of rape and men controlled the police and court system and there was not an ounce of empathy or compassion. That was the whole reason why I never told anyone when I was date raped at the age of sixteen, a few months later. Unfortunately, at sixteen I wasn't as brave as I am today. 5 Shocking New Facts About Rape

Finally, women are fed up and tired of being shut down and being quiet. We are waking up and it's about time. The health and wellness of women has been overlooked for far too long and women deserve the right to take care of their bodies so that they aren't irresponsibly bringing children into the world are not ready for. How To Get Him To Use Protection

(1) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clitoridectomy
(2) New study shows female genital mutilation exposes women and babies to significant risk at childbirth" (Press release). World Health Organization. 2006-06-02. http://www.who.int/mediacentre/news/releases/2006/pr30/en/index.html

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