Brilliant Questions To Ask To Find Out If Someone Truly Shares Your Values

A fine example of using humor to navigate the world.

Jay Salazar on TikTok thejaysalazar / TikTok
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A man named Jay Salazar, whose TikTok bio states that he uses the social media platform for “educational [and] political satire,” shared a humorous and astute post titled, “Testing the waters when I meet someone new.” 

Salazar posted questions and phrases that subtly ‘test the waters’ to find out if someone shares your values.

In his TikTok post, Salazar filmed himself having an imaginary conversation with a person he’d just met. He began by stating, “Oh, hey, I just got back from the gender-neutral bathroom,” before pausing and squinting inquisitively. 

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“I love this place, too, I heard they pay their workers a livable wage,” he exclaimed, pretending to wait for his companion’s reaction. “Actually, these prices are a little high for me, ABORT!” He said next, staring pointedly.

   

   

Salazar kept up the act that he was at a restaurant, wondering, “What to eat? The rich?” He then burst out laughing. “Oh, I’ll have the bodily autonomy,” he continued. 

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“It’s just so hard to choose when you have so many options from around the world,” he said, then mouthed the word “round” with intention. “A little chilly in here, climate change, am I right?” He stated, as though he was waiting for the person he was with to deny its existence. 

“Well done steak? No judgment, no judgment, your body, your choice,” he said. 

Salazar’s sharp sense of humor highlights the extreme divisions that exist in America’s political and social landscape.

In imagining the various ways that a potential conversation might reveal someone’s true nature, Salazar offers a stark and brutally honest take on the direction a particular part of humanity seems to be moving. His post lays bare our current reality. 

People who have been historically marginalized, like queer and trans people, like women, like people of color, are witnessing their rights being methodically stripped away. We’re standing along the edge of a crucial precipice, one where compassion, justice, and the basic human right to exist, are at risk of being lost. 

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“Haven’t seen the waiter in a while, wonder where they are,” Salazar asked, putting extra emphasis on the word “they.” He continued, “Hi, nice to meet you, my pronouns are He/Him.”

“I hate that Andrew Tate,” he exclaimed, then corrected himself. “Oh, I said ‘Andrew’s late...’ for prison.”

“Cancel culture, am I right? They should cancel my student loans,” he laughed. 

“I was gonna come by Uber, but instead, I called ACAB,” he announced. “I love Black coffee, I’m not DeSatan, I mean, DeSantis.”

Salazar continued his imagined conversation, explaining, “Yeah, I’m a teacher. I used to teach science... science?” Again, he waited for a response. 

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Everyone has a right to hold their own opinions and political views, though there’s something to be said about whether or not those views actively harm people. Salazar’s questions hold weight, showing just how essential it is for us to truly center empathy in how we relate to those around us.  

Alexandra Blogier is a writer on YourTango's news and entertainment team. She covers social issues, pop culture analysis and all things to do with the entertainment industry.