Dad Says Mom Is 'Raising A Cheater' Because Of Their 7-Year-Old Daughter's 'Play-Relationships'
She's only seven years old.
AlohaHawaii / Shutterstock & cottonbro studio / Pexels After getting into a bit of a tizzy with her husband about their 7-year-old daughter, Layla, one mom went onto the “r/AmItheA--hole” (AITA) subreddit to figure out if she was in the wrong about the way that their argument went.
Their argument was about Layla and the play relationships she was having with boys at her school. Her father took what she was doing very seriously, while her mom brushed it off.
He’s accusing her of ‘raising a cheater’ because she was holding hands with two different boys.
Since she’s only seven years old, take everything with a grain of seriousness as these are children we’re talking about, not grown adults.
The mom realizes this but provides some context for those who might think she’s actually in the wrong.
“A few months ago, Layla got a ‘boyfriend,’ Lucas,” she explains. “They are both 7, so it's obviously not a real relationship. They just hold hands sometimes and they drew each other hearts for Valentine's day.”
It’s cute. Just a couple of kids mimicking the relationship they see at home from their parents or on TV most likely. Where’s the harm in that?
“This week, Layla was apparently holding hands with another boy — who also sent Layla a Valentine's day love letter — and Lucas took offense to it,” she explains. “We found out because Lucas’ parents called to tell us Lucas won't be coming over to us this Saturday like it was originally planned because he is mad at Layla.”
What a little heartbreaker! Once again, the kids are seven years old and don’t really know what love is or how relationships work, or what they’re really doing, so the mom thought nothing of it — except, she was the only one.
“My husband wants us to punish Layla and wants me to have a talk with her about faithfulness,” she writes. “At first, I thought he was joking, but no, he was serious. He says that Layla cheated on Lucas and I, as her mother, should do something about it.”
She explained to him that Layla was only seven and not a cheater and that she shouldn’t be treated as if she were an adult in an adult relationship who cheated on her adult partner.
“He then accused me of ‘raising a cheater’ and encouraging the bad behavior,” she finishes, wondering if she’s in the wrong for not wanting to punish her daughter.
A seven-year-old’s play relationship should not be treated as an adult one.
It should go without saying, but your seven-year-old child probably has no idea what she’s doing by having a “relationship” in the second grade.
According to ParentsCanada.com, kids will start to “form a concept of romantic relationships from watching their parents or other adults, as well as absorbing messages from the media, such as fairy tales and TV shows” after about 5 years old.
It’s at this point that “parents can introduce the concept of there being different types of relationships—and love.”
Clinical psychologist Dr. Karen Bax told ParentsCanada that “Along the whole developmental spectrum I would encourage parents not to tease or make a big deal out of these sorts of relationships and instead be curious about them.”
Now that Layla seems to have an interest in relationships, perhaps its time for her parents to have a conversation with her about love and the different kinds of relationships — preferably without calling her a cheater or treating her like an adult.
Isaac Serna-Diez is an Assistant Editor who focuses on entertainment and news, social justice, and politics. Keep up with his rants about current events on his Twitter.