Bride Refuses To Let Pregnant Bridesmaid Show Up Late To Wedding & Says She's 'Causing Her Stress'
The bride expected a 6 am arrival for all bridesmaids.
Stylish_Pics and Demkat / Shutterstock A woman who is pregnant with her first baby asked for advice on the English parenting forum Mumsnet. She explained that she’s a bridesmaid in an upcoming wedding, at which time she’ll be 20 weeks along in her pregnancy. She expressed how difficult her pregnancy has been so far; she’s had “bad morning sickness, tiredness and pelvic girdle pain.”
“My mornings are slower and harder,” she said, so she asked the bride if she could arrive after the 6 am start time on the day of the wedding.
The bride refused to let the pregnant bridesmaid come late to the wedding and said that her request was ‘causing her stress.’
The bridesmaid hoped that the bride would be flexible on timing, as the wedding was scheduled to start at 1 pm. She explained, “I asked if I could arrive later in the morning, ahead of her getting [her] dress on and [taking] photos. I’d get my hair and makeup done, of course, beforehand, but allowing [me] to come later will give me a better chance to last longer in the day.”
“Am I being unreasonable for wanting to come a little later?” The pregnant bridesmaid asked.
The bride insisted the bridesmaid arrive at 6 am for a 1 pm wedding, despite the fact that she suffers from morning sickness.
The bridesmaid explained that “of course” she’ll show up when the bride wants, but she feels like the bride’s expectations aren’t entirely fair, especially because she’s attending the rehearsal dinner the night before the wedding and is responsible for “a lot of duties on the day.”
Photo: Melike Benli / Pexels
In addition to being rigid about timing, the bride also told the bridesmaid that “she knows a pregnant lady who [has the] same date as me and she is ‘fine,’ which made me feel as though she thinks I’m lying about my struggles.”
A majority of people commenting on the post sided with the pregnant bridesmaid.
They believed that the bride was being reasonable by not accommodating what seemed like a simple request to come a little later in the morning.
One woman did acknowledge the bride’s point of view, explaining that the situation was a “hard one, because if I was the bride, this would definitely be stressing me out.” Yet the woman recognized that “it’s also a lot to ask of you if you’re feeling really rough.” She came to the conclusion that neither the bride nor the bridesmaid were being unreasonable, yet because the wedding seems like “a big production, [it] does require a bit more cooperation from everyone.”
Someone else made the observation that “throwing up on something on the morning of her wedding will cause much more stress than you arriving at a planned later time.”
Another person had a pointed response to the bride’s dismissive comment about knowing another pregnant person who’s “fine.” They advised the bridesmaid to “tell her you know a bride due to be married on the same day and she doesn't mind her bridesmaid being late.”
Planning and executing a wedding requires giving attention to the many moving pieces that make up the day. The bridesmaid clearly hoped that the bride would have some flexibility on timing or at least some compassion for her struggle with pregnancy symptoms. It seems like the bridesmaid planned to push through her discomfort and arrive at 6 am, putting aside her need for accommodations for the sake of her friend’s big day.
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Alexandra Blogier is a writer on YourTango's news and entertainment team. She covers relationship issues, pop culture analysis and all things to do with the entertainment industry.