6 Sadly Relatable Signs Of An Insecure Boss

Working with someone insecure is hard enough, but having that person as your boss can be more than difficult. 

Leadership coach and business owner Phillip M. Holmes knows this all too well. As someone who has both been in charge and coached others on how to do it, he understands what it takes to be a good leader — and what makes a bad one. 

Holmes took to Instagram to share part one and part two of what he termed “six signs you or your boss is an insecure leader.” According to Holmes, “Every single one is why 84% of employees face unnecessary stress.”

These are Holmes’ 6 signs of an insecure boss:

1. They 'micromanage and hate delegating.'

A boss who insists on doing everything themselves, or at least keeping an extra close eye on everything, can be a red flag. It takes away employees’ chances to grow and learn. 

“You police and second guess your team’s every move instead of coaching and empowering them,” Holmes elaborated. Trying to do everything on your own is no way to lead.

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2. They take criticism personally.

Constructive criticism or feedback is meant to grow and stretch you, not degrade you. If someone reacts defensively to someone suggesting they do things differently, it may be a sign of emotional immaturity.

Holmes said that it’s not good if “you get defensive or emotional when a weakness is exposed rather than viewing it as a chance to grow or improve.”

3. They 'manage through intimidation.'

Holmes defined managing through intimidation as “[using] fear to keep your employees on the edge and in line.” Instead, he recommended “leading with vulnerability and openness.”

A leader who closes themselves off from others isn’t helping anyone. Intimidation tactics do not inspire respect. Being open with those in your charge shows them they can trust you and even admire you.

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4. They 'don’t like change.'

Holmes said this occurs when “you love doing things the way they’ve always been done, even if a new approach could be beneficial.” It’s easy to get stuck doing things the same way they have always been, but doing so out of fear is a sign of insecurity.

“This is often rooted in a fear of risk and a lack of confidence in your ability to adapt or lead effectively through change,” Holmes said. Don’t let a distaste for change skew your leadership abilities.

5. They 'feel threatened by competent employees.'

It can be hard to feel like you’re always in competition with those around you. If a boss feels threatened by others whose performance is positive, they might try “limiting their opportunities, downplaying their success, and not investing in their growth.”

This can leave someone stuck in the same place when they don’t deserve to be. Instead, it’s best to see these people as an opportunity to be further pushed out of your comfort zone and buoyed by their strengths.

6. They're 'obsessed with appearing smart.'

Holmes argued that a boss’ “primary focus as a leader” should always be “the collective success and growth of my team and the organization as a whole.” If your focus is on how intelligent you seem, you’ll be “obsessed with receiving credit and external validation.” You can’t be a team player that way, and, as the leader, that’s vitally important.

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Having an insecure boss is hard, but once you recognize the signs you can better manage the uncertainty that might get thrown at you during the workday.

It’s certainly not rare to encounter bosses with insecurity and it might be innate to want to "fight back" in these instances, but as Harvard Business Review noted, that's not the best decision. Instead, take a step back and curb your hostility. Disdain for management is never the answer. Practice patience and frame your work as a collaborative so your boss sees you as a team player and views your successes as their own as well. 

The first step, however, is recognizing the signs so you can be better equipped to handle whatever gets thrown your way because of them. 

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Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer for YourTango who covers entertainment, news and human interest topics.