8 Ways To Use Your TONGUE To Make Sex So. Much. Hotter
There's always room for improvement.
It's well-known that the human tongue is one of the most complex and flexible muscles in our bodies, so let's use it to its full advantage during oral sex.
Most of us remember the first time we were French kissed, and for most, it was a lightning bolt over the altar experience.
"Bring that forward to dramatically enhance the pleasure you give your partner. This can include using your tongue pretty much anywhere on your partner's body that he or she likes, from head to toe (and even rimming for the truly adventurous)," says sexpert Coleen Singer of sssh.com.
For men, here are a couple of tips when giving her cunnilingus.
1. Take it slow, and focus on a circular motion.
Slowly begin tracing circles around her clitoris with your tongue.
"Make sure your movements are slow, steady and rhythmic. Use very light, slow circles — pretend your tongue is a feather when you first begin. As her pleasure increases, begin to flick the hood of her clitoris like you are teasing it. It has over 6,000 nerve endings, so be gentle!" says Singer.
2. Lightly move your tongue from side-to-side.
"As an alternative to using circles around her clitoral shaft, lick her clitoris sideways with light strokes of your tongue," says Singer. As always, maintain a steady rhythm. This allows her to stay in touch mentally with what you're doing.
And for the ladies, here are tips to keep in mind when giving him a blowjob:
1. Flick his frenulum.
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The tongue is great for licking the head of his penis, but there's more to explore.
"The frenulum (the sensitive area on a penis where the head (glans) and the shaft meet on the bottom side) contains a bundle of nerves. Flick it with the tip of your tongue or circle the head of the penis slowly, stopping each time you hit this pleasure spot," says Singer.
2. Play with his foreskin.
If your man has a foreskin, use it to your advantage as it is very sensitive and is a great place to tease with oral sex.
"As he gets more erect, use your tongue to gently push the foreskin back with your tongue and lips," says Singer.
3. Suck on your finger (or your partner's).
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This may sound wild, but the sensation of sucking is primal — it can be both comforting and arousing.
"A number of my clients find that sucking on their own finger helps them to relax and ease into the moment. They're not aroused by the sucking, but it facilitates their ability to be present, which makes sex all the hotter," says sexologist Dr. Jess.
4. Kiss them passionately in the heat of the moment.
Many people ask me how to get more kisses from their partner.
"My answer: create a peak erotic association. When your partner is at the height of arousal, hit them with a passionate, deep tongue kiss so that they learn to associate kissing with orgasm. You'll find that they're more likely to incorporate kissing into foreplay once they perceive it as an erotic experience," says Dr. Jess.
5. Use your tongue to pad your teeth.
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To get a tighter grip without tiring out your jaw, use your tongue to cover your lower teeth and your upper lip to cover your upper teeth. Squeeze the shaft between your teeth using your tongue and lips and soft, wet padding. This works best with a bit of lube on your upper lip.
6. Take your partner's bottom lip in your mouth and gently suck on it.
"You can also flick the tip of your tongue across their bottom lip. It's unexpected, stimulates the nerves in a different way and can be incredibly hot and sexy," says Antonia Hall, MA, psychologist, relationship expert, sexpert, and the award-winning author of The Ultimate Guide to a Multi-Orgasmic Life.
7. Nibble on your partner's ear.
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The gentlest breath near their ear can cause delicious chills down their spine.
"Using just the tip of your tongue, trace around the outside of the earlobe and softly suck on their earlobe to turn up the heat," says Hall.
8. Move upward.
"Kiss the length of their neck, nibbling, and tracing the tip of your tongue from their ear to shoulder to set your honey ablaze," says Hall.