10 Phrases Of Affirmation Your Man Desperately Wants To Hear
Men need to be reminded that they're loved too.
Bogoljubb / Shutterstock Just like anyone else, men like to know that they matter, that they're a vital and important part of our lives.
So when you open your mouth to tell him something kind, make sure you've thought of the words of affirmation men love to hear. While these work great for romantic partners, words of affirmation are for men of all sorts! Your dad, your grandpa, your son, and even your best guy friend.
Here are 10 phrases of affirmation your man desperately wants to hear:
1. "You're great."
When you mean it authentically, this affirmation is more than just a compliment — it's a reminder that he is seen for all of the good things he does. If he's being funny, saying, "You're great" while you're laughing is a deeper compliment than just, "You're funny!" It's about his whole aura and what he brings to the world.
2. "I appreciate your hard work and effort."
Sometimes, men will make an attempt to please us by fixing things or doing various chores or tasks to make us happy. Saying that we appreciate his effort and work is a statement that will go so far with anyone, but especially with men because society has taught them that their value lies in how they contribute, financially and physically. Of course, this shouldn't be the only thing you value about the men in your life, but recognizing the hard work of anyone, regardless of gender, is a lovely gift to give.
3. "I'm proud of you."
As noted above, men are often taught to measure their worth by their work and accomplishments. Personally, I find this to be better than what women are often judged by — how nice they are, how pretty they are, or how many friends they have. But I digress...
Telling a man how proud you are of him for whom he is and what he does makes him feel like you hold him in a positive and endearing light.
4. "When you're ready to talk, I'm here."
Men don't always want to talk, especially when you want them to. Telling him that you're here when he's ready to talk lets him feel respected, loved, and understood. Those seven words go a long way.
5. "Go see your friends."
Jealousy rears its ugly head in many relationships, and I have heard from many men about how their female partners tend to get angry or jealous when they want to see friends. Telling your man to go see his friends without clenched teeth or constant texts shows him the affirmation he needs: You trust him. You value his free time and identity as a person.
6. "I value your opinion."
Telling your best guy that you value his opinion and want his feedback makes him feel useful, helpful, and loved. You will make his day when you tell him this.
7. "You look so handsome."
Women aren't the only "birds" whose feathers like to be fluffed. Of course, this isn't a phrase of affirmation to use with your boss, but even your dad or brother might appreciate a compliment on their looks at the right moment.
8. "You're a good man."
Let's be real, there's a lot of dialogue about "good men versus bad men," and men know this. They know what women believe to be a good man versus a bad man. Telling him he's a good man reminds him that you see his goodness. That goes a long way!
9. "I understand" or "I'm trying to understand."
We won't always intuitively understand how others feel, but when we do make an effort, it makes them feel great. If you don't understand a man, tell him you are trying. The effort makes the difference.
10. "I respect the stuff you're into ..."
This is mostly for romantic partners, but it can also be used for a male bestie or your grown son — any man you share an emotional dependence with. If you truly respect a guy's need for a certain hobby or habit, telling him that you respect his individual quirks makes him feel as if you allow him to be his own person and that your feelings aren't hurt when he does something you can't (or don't want to) join in on.
11. "I think it's so cool that you ...."
As much as people love compliments about their overall selves, like "you're great" or "you're handsome", taking note of one thing they are passionate about and sharing why you admire it is even more meaningful. For instance, "I think it's cool that you're so committed to your weekly birdwatching walk" or "I think it's so cool that you are so passionate about doing what's right, even when it's hard or unpopular" or even "I think it's so cool that you're so engaged with your kids' activities."
Laura Lifshitz is a former MTV personality and Columbia University graduate currently writing about divorce, sex, women’s issues, fitness, parenting, and marriage. Her work has been featured on YourTango, New York Times, DivorceForce, Women’s Health, Working Mother, Pop Sugar, and more.